Twelve Days of Christmas... Son of Sauron style...

On the First Day of Christmas...

Hello! This is just a bit of tomfoolery between me and Legolas for the holidays! ... Aw, man, Legolas, why'd you invite Sauron?

*Legolas* Yo, it's all okay, I'm the Thane!

*me* Really? *sighs*

*Gandalf*

YOOO MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!

----------

ANODIENPOV

I grumble as a goblin servant walks in carrying a large sack of clothes and a letter.

"These came for you, Princess." Oh, it had better not be from...

"It's from Prince Greenleaf, your Highness." Of course. He bows, the sharp end of his nose brushing the ground.

"Get out of here." I dismiss the servant and rip open the letter. How did Legolas manage to put up with these idiots all day? Every day?

Guess I'll have to get used to it... I think crossly. As much as I cared for one certain Elf, I certainly didn't like these things invading my privacy. I look down and read the letter.

Anodien,

I expect you to live up to your end of the deal. I won the bet, so I believe this is yours.

Fondest Farewells,

-L

Argh! Why did I even make that bet? I'd taken a gamble a few weeks ago, that I would... uh... ahem... I'm not getting into that right now. So you, my fascinated reader, can zip your lips. Ask Legolas, I'm sure he'll tell you. He should be a few hallways down. No, I am not going to show you the way. Geez, what do you think I am, a map? Ask a maid or something, this place seems to be teeming with the little buggers. Now get out before I do something you'll regret... that I won't... but will still get in trouble for.

LEGOLASPOV

Ah, who's this? Oh, a visitor to Rivendell? Hey, I'm Legolas Greenleaf, though I'm sure you already knew that. Have you met my friend, Anodien? You have, I see. Oh... well, I'd say you're lucky you made it here in one piece. She's very cranky right now. You see, she lost a bet we made a while back. I was traveling with her a few weeks ago when we happened upon an odd little inn....

----//-------\\-------------

Okay, it was a completely normal inn, but they were widely known for their spices. We were in the marketplace when she rushes back to the inn we were staying at. So I look at Anodien, and she just grins and says,

"Betcha I can drink an entire pint of that fire pepper sauce faster than you can!"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa! Hold the bow here, Anodien! You're expecting me to chug a glass of that?" I had asked incredulously. I wasn't going to back out, though. "You're on!"

"Loser has to wear a crochet sweater of the winner's choice... on Christmas, in front of the entire Court!" She smiled devilishly with a nudge. "You're not going to chicken out now, are you, Legolas?"

"Of course not!" I'd replied hotly.

"You're going to hate your Christmas present, Legolas."

"Oh, well then I'd hate to disappoint you, but I look good in anything." Pulling me over to the inn we were staying at, Anodien slapped two coins on the bar.

"Two pints of the flame pepper sauce, please!" She'd said excitedly. The innkeeper looked at her like she was crazy- which she probably was.

"You mean just put the broth in the cup?"

"That would be great."

*********

Five minutes later, the bartender nervously handed us two mugs of the spice- thing. I raised my glass in a toast.

"Count of three..."

"One..."

"Two..."

"Three!" As soon as the liquid hit my tongue, I knew that I'd made a terrible mistake. It was like being bathed in dragon fire- except in your stomach. I gagged and looked at Anodien, who had also not anticipated this level of spice. I had to win, though. Closing my eyes, I chugged through that dreck and pulled through, slamming my cup to the floor.

"Augh bvwin!" I announce loudly, holding my tongue. "Shkooz bee, augh deed dum wader..." I grabbed the nearest pitcher and poured it on my face.

"Dot bair! Gib bee dum doo!" Anodien snatched the pitcher and literally dumped her head in the jug of water. The sight of this fearless warrior running around with a pitcher on her head brought tears to my eyes- or maybe it was just the spice. Possibly both.

"Shut up, idiot. I didn't expect it to be so hot!"

"Oh, but you should be used to that level of hotness, being around me all the time, right?" I joked. She aimed a playful punch at my shoulder, blushing as red as the flame sauce.

"Shut up, Legolas!"

"So you're not denying it?"

"ARGH!"

"...Still not denying it."

----

So, after that point, I'd decided to be a good sport about it.

-------

"I'll have a servant drop off your shirt on Christmas... I'd hate to have it go missing or be brutally destroyed for unknown reasons before then."

---------

She actually hadn't spoken to me for days afterwards. I mean, who could blame her? Oh, look here she comes. Umm... uh... you might want to hide. She's got a knife! Hurry, into the closet! Oh, hey there, Anodien!

"Quit smirking and let's get this over with..." She grumbles, much to my own amusement. There, she's gone. You can come out, now, my friend. I think it's safe. Let's go join her at the party. That I<3LEGOLAS sweater was so cute on her!... I should probably sleep with a guard tonight, shouldn't I?

------///-------

A/N: Hello! This is the first of my Twelve Days postings for Christmas! A different assortment of stories each time! Well, maybe almost possibly.... I might continue in a later short story. On the first day of Christmas, Anodien gave to thee...

A mug full of liquid that is really freaking spicy!