ETERNAL SUNSHINE OF THE SPOTLESS MIND

I can't sleep ii

my days seem to only be consumed by aimless thoughts, all leading back to you. it almost feels like its been years since I've felt your touch, the plush of your lips against my own, heard your tender toned words and seen your smile. it's only been two weeks. why are you plaguing my thoughts again?

I'm sat here writing, writing about the dreams I've been having, writing about you. I never write, but nowadays it seems to be that the only words that escape me are the ones that I write about you. my fingers have become accoustmed to holding the pencil so often, though my palm still aches. today I had another dream ,of you of course. it wasn't something I remembered, perhaps it never happened and it's just a figment of my imagination, it just felt so real.

your fingers were travelling over the white hills across the sheets, warmth radiating from your bare chest. your hair was a sort of mess, splayed against the pillow with a warm smile tainting your lips. your cheek was pressed flush against the pillow, with the sound of soft sounding laughs escaping your lips every now and then. you seemed peaceful. then you looked at me, but your eyes had seemed jaded and your voice sounded worn out. the touch of your fingers that were ghosting over my arm become a touch more pressured, more rough. I can't remember the exact details, though I've recited the images over and over so many times it seems to have almost been burned into my memory. a pool of dark coloured tears, almost a maroon red began to fall from your eyes and the circles beneath your eyes began to darken. the once white sheets turned stained whilst your own tears began to pool around you. you were drowning in your own mess, it seemed like. I could only watch, watch what we had, what we could have been being drowned away in a sort of sorrow I cannot explain.