Take My Heart.

Chapter two:

Magnus's POV:

I've never been so embarrassed in my life. I imagined that exact moment to be so much more beautifully complex than the complete ignominy I just practically threw myself into. He looked coldly into my eyes, the storm-swept blue that tinged and gaped right through me made my heart sink. Did he really feel that way?

As told, I turned my back to the most arresting man I believe to be understanding when in need of his comfort. The room was filled with flowers and bright colours, the clave and silent brothers following my every move in disgust that accelerated my discomposure. It wasn't the audience that hurt me with their distaste of my arrival, it was the sharp stern rebuke that I could see Alec telling me through his eyes.

That one look from Alec... tore me apart. It was like I was being forced through a shredder and all that I am after is shreds of something that used to be whole. I know he feels something and I know he's lying just to protect his family.... but he knows that he's doing himself no good.

Home feels different now, maybe it's because the smell of Ragnor still lingers in the air or the half empty bottle of whiskey left on the small glass table besides my couch. I throw myself into the couch with my hair let loose and dangling on my forehead, wondering what Alec's doing right now. Is he happy? Is he really in love with Lydia? Or is he remorseful.... letting me go?

The pain still aches in my chest and echoes through my body as I hold the cold glass of whiskey against my chest whilst circling the rim with my finger. I close my eyes and watch the moment replay in my head until I hear a familiar softly spoken voice... Ragnor. I open my eyes to gaze upon the taut figure that sits comfortably in the armchair opposite me. Ragnor always has that more elegant flare than me, like how he sits in a more charming manner, one leg crossed over the other and his hands gently resting upon his knee.
"Magnus, don't get so wound up." His thick voice mutters through the creases of his lips.
"How can you say that? Yes I walked in there with my heart on my sleeve ready to make a decision that I would never have decided if it wasn't for you." I take another sip from my crystal glass and then place it on the side table next to me. As I sit up Ragnor has disappeared from his seat and re-appeared beside me.
"Well at least you got up and did something. I mean it was dreadful enough to see you sat here mourning over those awful pictures of me... but now you're sat he sulking over a man." His words hurt but it was the truth.
"Ragnor.... can you even blame me? In that moment I too was willing to give up everything I built up... I'd come this far just to fall. Why can't he see that I've risked something as well." I rest my head into the palm of my hand as Ragnor sympathetically rubs my back.

"Then get up and try again.."
"Are you completely deranged? I don't want to do that again." I sit up and stare right into Ragnor's eyes, the intense brown but softness of them peering back at me.
"Well you've come this far. So don't give up because of what he said, use that as motivation to push harder... there's a better way than this miserable outcome, you clearly love him." Ragnor can be rather infuriating and blunt but he does know what he's talking about.

He's right, I think I'm in love with Alec.