Devoted to Secrets {Jimin x Reader} (completed!)

Save Me

*Jimin's POV*

"Whats your emergency?"

"I-uh, my- my- please... I need an ambulance!" I stumbled upon my words. I never imagined i'd have to say something as terrifying as this. I hung up, hands trembling as I tried my best to keep her alive. What could I do? I'm no doctor. I unwrapped my scarf and wrapped it around her neck, desperately hoping that would do anything to help her wake up, but her eyes remained closed and her body remained silent. "I'm sorry- (y/n) I'm so sor-" but I couldn't help it. My eyes swelled, forming unstoppable tears. I never meant to end a life....over a harsh joke of mine. There were tears. What felt like thousands of them falling onto her sweater, seeping in.

I was sitting on my heels on the floor next to her. My body was bent forwards, my forehead lightly resting on her hand that was resting on her tummy. Weakness was all I felt. I cried, for her, when just hours ago I laughed at her.

Why did I laugh?

Because she was starting to learn what love was.

She was just starting, and a simple set of words were taking her life away now. I cried. I saw her laying there. Without anger, without happiness, without life. It made me desperate to scream. I wanted to hear her, through anger, through complaints.. I just wanted to be able to hear that she was with me.

All I heard were my whimpers and impatient begs for her to wake up. I held her hand unconsciously. They were cold when the inside of this house was warm. They were small against mine. Small and yet eager to hit me. That's what hurt me the most. That I never meant to make her so upset all the time. I just didn't know how to act around her and show her the truth and now I'm losing her.

I heard the ambulance arrive and my head sprung up. I looked at her body once again. I don't want to leave her, but I did. I gently let go of her hand and ran to the front door. I could feel my eyes swollen and the tears drying and staining my face. I didn't care. I opened the door and they walked in.

"She's upstairs. Please.." I didn't even know what to say. I wanted to beg for them to wake her up now as if they could work any miracle.

They ran up the stairs and assessed her wound before making any moves. They looked troubled. That's never a good sign. My worries became worse at that sight. I wanted to ask a billion questions but I knew giving them space and concentration would do her better. They brought in a stretcher and began manually assisting her in her breathing. They did all sorts of things like lifting her chin up for her to breathe more efficiently, placing a binding wrap, etc. They transferred her onto the stretcher and placed her into the ambulance, immediately beginning with more first aid.

They didn't let me go with her. There simply wasn't enough space for me to be there. I couldn't help and me going with her would just mean taking up space to just watch her when they could use it to work on saving her. I got in my car immediately after grabbing my keys, my phone, her phone, and locking the house up.

I drove but my mind was clouded with a billion possibilities I didn't want to think about. What if I got there and they told me it was too late? That they did all they could? That nothing could've been done?

How do I prepare for this? It's a possibility. How could I tell her mother who loves her more than anything. How could I tell her mother that it was my fault her daughter died. How could I not blame myself? How could I accept that this could happen. How could I let this happen. I stared at the road, cold to my toes.

I arrived to the hospital confused. I shouldn't be here. I should be home, preparing her favorite dinner and preparing my apology. We should both be home, enjoying a quiet dinner over the sound of rain crashing against the window. I couldn't care less if the power went out while we ate. I would enjoy every second of it just as long as I wasn't here now.