misfits // z.m

ch. 7 || fire and ice

VII. fire and ice

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[Thalia's POV]

The strength of the sun had gone, its rays only slightly warming to my face as I woke.

Fragments of last night slipped into my thoughts; tears, heartbreak, cold kitchen tiles, arms holding me...

My eyes fluttered open.

An arm was draped over my waist, almost refusing to be moved.

I gasped and sat up quickly, hurtling off the bed.

Seeing it was Zayn, my heartbeat slowed to a gentle pounding. 

He was asleep...with me, and somehow hadn't stirred.

Anger, simmering somewhere in my blood, made me tug my hair angrily and groan out in frustration. Again, I let him become too close, and again, I was regretting every single thing.

I pierced my lip between my teeth, biting so hard I drew blood.

As I flickered my gaze to Zayn, who was sleeping soundly and unperturbed, my gaze softened.

He wanted me to try and fall in love with him before December.

As my mind remembered, it was not so hard falling in love, but it was much harder falling out of it.

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In the bathroom, I splashed my face with cold water and held onto the sides of the basin so tightly my knuckles became white.

In that half hour time space before Zayn woke, I'd been and showered, and had enough time to interrogate Dana on her latest one night stand. 

She had been almost as unlucky in love as I was, yet she was still kind enough to give him breakfast before kicking him out the door.

"How was...he?" I asked, referring to his sexual prowess. I blushed.

"Terrible. There was no...chemistry. The only excitement I got was when that guy walked in on us. Who was he?" 

I frowned, "Who?"

Being faced away from the door, I couldn't see who entered the kitchen until Dana answered, "him."

Zayn smiled at me and then at Dana. "Good morning." He yawned and stretched, his top riding up slightly so I could see the fine, dark hairs trailing down his stomach. I gulped. 

"Hey, I'm Dana." She said, biting her lip and putting on her best seductive voice. 

My eyes rolled and Zayn winked at me, "I know. I heard." He gave her a pointed look and a blush appeared on her cheeks.

"Why are you still here?" I asked him, the familiar anger and tension uncoiling inside my stomach. 

"I'm going now, anyway." 

"You never answered my question." I stated. 

"Can we talk outside?"

Dana nodded at me and lifted her glass of juice to her mouth, waving one flirty hand at Zayn as I followed him outside into our hall. 

Immediately, Zayn leaned me against the wall and bracketed my sides with his arms, leaning in to kiss me on my cheek. "We only have a few months to make this work. I couldn't let you sleep alone when you'd just been crying." 

"You don't have to spend every hour with me, Zayn. I need to get my head around this - I can barely understand myself, and with you in the picture, my mind is going crazy." I stressed, massaging my head.

Zayn, still stood in front of me, smelled of old spice - a woody smell so tangible it made my skin shiver with delight.

His eyes were intimidating; they saw everything I was trying to hide. 

"Why are you so afraid?" He murmured. 

And that was it - I didn't know. I'd perhaps never know.

"I don't know." I whispered as he planted kisses down my neck.

I shivered and had enough strength to push him off me. "Can we go somewhere? For a walk?" 

"But it's cold." He pointed out, opening the door; the roaring wind silenced us.

"Exactly,” I smiled.

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"Why, of all people, did you choose me? You were engaged." I asked him, sitting a distance away from him on the bench. 

Zayn shuffled over towards me, "You're different. You don't care...about having to fit in. You're yourself, and that's all I want you to be." 

"You don't even know me." I countered. 

He faced me then, and cupped my face in his cold hands. "Then teach me."

And soon, I'd forgotten my reticence towards him and let him kiss me - his lips brushed over my sensitive ones; a gentle movement which revealed he cared. It felt as if he was scared of breaking me. 

"You don't have to be scared anymore." He whispered, resting his forehead against mine.

I nodded, though I was scared. I was scared because of how handsome he was, and that I would never be enough.

"Care to tell me what happened?" He asked softly.

I shook my head of dark, messy hair. "I'm not ready yet." 

He nodded slowly, "I'll wait."

A moment, maybe a minute or two, perhaps longer, passed before one of us spoke.

"Do you ever get tired of being in the news?" I asked curiously. 

He shrugged, "Sometimes. Comes with the job, I suppose." He stood up and held out his hand for me to take. 

"They can be vicious. The media can be a terrible thing." He murmured. "Could you put up with it?"

I hesitated, "Maybe." 

"Maybe." He repeated, drawing me in by the waist for another kiss.

My fury melted; he was like a fire whereas I was the ice.

It was a dangerous but beautifully passionate combination, and staring into his eyes only made me want more.