A Thousand Words

Wedding Day

I was woken up at 6 am the very next day, pulled out of bed and blindly led to the sink. I hardly knew what was going on. My mind had forgotten why I was here. My brain finally awoke when a cold bucket of water was splashed onto my head, sending some water down my back. But my mind still didn’t know what was going on. It refused to.

It was just like yesterday- except more. Step by step, makeup, hair, feet, hands and clothes. It was when I was finally made to wear the dress a clan of butterflies exploded in my tummy. This was for the wedding- the wedding where I was to be the bride. I refused to move. The maids stared at each other, lost. They didn’t know what to do, I was refusing to budge, just standing there as stiff as I could. Not one of them could make me move, after about ten minutes one of the maids finally left. I didn’t know where she’d gone, maybe one by one they were giving up.

I almost relaxed, that was before I heard a very familiar- too familiar- voice outside the door. It was the blasted, bloody Prince. He didn’t sound too happy either now that I was listening more carefully. Well, haha to him. See if I care. After a moment of silence I heard his footsteps die away, the maid returned. She stared at her feet.

“Ma’am, His Highness said that if you don’t change he will take yesterdays deal into consideration.” My heart sank at her words, the maid obviously didn’t know what she was talking about but I did. My shoulders slumped in defeat, what could I do from here? Let some other person die for myself? I couldn’t, I would have to live with the guilt for the rest of miserable life. And where was I to go? I no longer had Uncle and Jameelah had proved that having friends was a waste. My life was over and I had to deal with it. The butterflies in my tummy turned into snakes, my eyes started prickling a little. And there I had thought that I’d used up all my tears yesterday.

The dress was placed on me, it was I have to admit beautiful. Still a creamy colour, it had gold threads and had a lot of layers to it. And of course there was the dreaded corset. When they tightened it I almost started weeping, believe it or not but it hurts and the maids tightened it even more than yesterday, were they trying to crush my ribcage? To be quite honest those corsets made me feel fat, if a girl was supposed to have a waist that tiny the world was going to end, then most of the population of girls would not be classed as girl- including me, since I haven’t really seen anyone with such a tiny waist. The males should try it out once or twice.

My face didn’t have too much on it, there a lot of surma. I stared at myself in the mirror, wondering whether I should warn the maids that the make-up would be ruined due to my tears. I didn’t. I was planning not to cry actually, just block the whole world out, it wasn’t like I had much to live for anyway.

Soon that pig of a prince would find another wife. Maybe then I could be free, but I had heard about what happened to wives who belonged in a harem, it disgusted me. These men were so… indescribable, stupid, ignorant and desperate. I sighed, at least if he- when he married again- I would be forgotten. Maybe I could blend in to the background and eat all day, sleep all day and do nothing. I certainly hope I didn’t turn out that way.

The translucent fabric of the veil was dropped over my face- that was when I knew that I was going. I stared at the ground, overwhelming sadness and hopelessness washing over me. Those feeling soon turned bitter, if only I was selfish at a time like this. I’m not saying I wasn’t, but right now I couldn’t let my selfish thoughts control me.

I didn’t think I would be able to walk that day but I found my feet moving. Two guards let me to carriage- without wheels. I stared at it. It was one of those things that people moved, my tummy lurched somehow very self conscious of how heavy I was. I wondered if the carriage thing might break… hopefully it would. That would give the Prince second thoughts. I glanced at the guards, hmmm, the Prince soon to be King was definitely not taking any chances. My eyes flickered over to the gates, would he really kill someone… I didn’t doubt it but… the guards seemed to see me looking at the gates and motioned me to get in. Hesitantly, I stepped in.