phil
you see, i was just minding my own business, working my shift, when pj burst through the door. he came in so quickly, the bell didn't even have time to react. he marched right over to the counter i was currently standing. fortunately, there weren't any customers in line or else he probably would've shoved them out of the way.
"why the heck are you and dan ignoring each other? he's been sad, super sad for about a week. and so have you, from what i can tell." he says.
i refuse to look at him, wiping out a cup with a washrag. i could explain the truth, or i could say i just haven't gotten around to replying to him. in truth, i'm just distancing myself. if i let myself get too attached to him, he'll probably leave just like chris. or he'll cheat, like chris, because i bore him. so i just.. didn't answer. he hadn't tried to contact me further, understandably. i'd left him on read both times he'd texted.
"well?" pj prompted.
i let the truth spill out, ending it with me swearing him to secrecy about it.
"just.. don't tell him. please. it'd better this way." i finished. pj looked uncertain but he nodded. then he disappeared as quickly as he'd come.
annabelle starts poking around in her music playlist, switching the playlist. 'ilusm' by gnash comes on. my head shoots up.
"annabelle, why're you playing this?" i ask quietly. she shrugs and explains that it was in her recommendations so she listened and liked. go her, i guess.
i take my fifteen minute break and step out back. the chilly october air makes me shiver in my light jacket. i sit on a milk crate and look at my phone. dan's contact name was still 'anime boy'. i wonder if mine is still 'sunflower field'.
maybe i should text him. i do miss him quite a lot, although i hadn't wanted to admit that to myself.
what've i got to lose?
sunflower field: hi.
anime boy: oh hello.
sunflower field: how've you been?
anime boy: peachy, you?
sunflower field: i'm sorry.
anime boy: alright.
sunflower field: i really am.
anime boy: okay.
sunflower field: i've got to go. bye dan.
anime boy: bye phil.
i knew he only meant bye for now, but it still stung in my chest.
