Fandom Reader Inserts

Deadpool x Reader - Marvel

The Tailor (Prompt Fic)
    Prompt: "Whatever you're going to ask, the answer is No!"
Fandom: Marvel
Pairing: Deadpool X Reader
Summary: You take care of Deadpool after he comes to your apartment in pieces, then he's off hurtling into danger again, what the hell are you going to do with him? He really needs a child leash.
Word Count: 2045
Warnings: blood and inferences of adult themes? Idk it's Deadpool, he's going to be crude.
A/N: This is my first time writing Deadpool, and my first time breaking the fourth wall (I'm not even sure I really did it right oops), so please be gentle. I know the ending is pretty sucky but I tried. I hope you enjoy the Merc with a mouth, but who wouldn't?

You heard a frantic knocking on your apartment door. You blearily wiped the sleep from your eyes and threw the covers off of you before sighing and making your way towards the pounding. When you were finally able to unlock the door and work the handle, the sight that met your eyes was not a surprising one.

A man in a red suit covered in blood and riddled with holes limped into your apartment without a word. You were finally starting to wake up, so you headed to the kitchen to grab an ice pack for the wounded merc. After turning on the coffee pot you returned to find Wade laying on your couch with one of his arms draped over his eyes. You placed the ice on his stomach where the worst of the damage seemed to be.

He hissed slightly as the cold touched his mending skin, but relaxed as the ice pack worked to numb the area. You returned to the kitchen and began to make some semblance of a breakfast. You searched through your cupboards for something to eat, and found some easy muffin mix. You added the water and some extra chocolate chips before pouring your concoction into a non-stick cake pan, because it was too early for the complexity of muffin tins. You preheated the oven and poured your guest and yourself some coffee while you waited.

When you returned to the living room, Wade was still in his earlier position, but the ice pack had moved farther south *wink*. You shook your head with a slight laugh and placed his mug on the coffee table. You mentioned that you were making breakfast, and he grumbled acknowledgement. You patted his arm and returned to the kitchen upon the beeping of the oven. You slid in the pan of muffin-cake, and set the timer to 15 minutes.

You peeked at Wade in the living room again to see he was tentatively moving his healing muscles. You wished you could do more for him, but he said he didn't want you to get hurt. You went to your room and grabbed a pair of sweatpants and a sweatshirt, then put them in the bathroom which you tried to organize slightly.

You looked at the muffin-cake, and after the toothpick test, considered it ready. You put some on a plate and returned to the living room to give it to Wade. He was gingerly sipping the coffee, and you saw his eyes perk up when he saw the food. He ate like he was starving. "I guess your stomach is healed then," you joked. Wade shook his head and said something unintelligible due to his face-stuffing.

You gave him a look and he swallowed before saying, "Stomach was fine, intestines were torn to shreds though." He quickly inhaled the rest of your muffin-cake. You even ended up "giving" him the rest of your piece, meaning he stole it while you went to check that you turned off the oven. When you returned to find your piece missing you just shook your head.

You told him to take a shower, and that you'd have more food ready when he was done. He gingerly got off the couch and slowly moved to the bathroom. It was then that you remembered the sad state of your pantry, so you grabbed the phone-book and found a mexican restaurant that delivered. You ordered a taco platter and some chimichangas (both for Wade, since he seemed to eat more when he was healing), and you decided to splurge on your favorite mexican dish.