philkas collection

chapped lips

philip is new to school, lukas is the first to notice him.

Punk! Lukas (KILL ME THAT WOULD BE SO GOOD)

Shy! Philip (with a stuttering impediment)

THIS IS FOR YOU SARA
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philip

school. a thing that everyone dreaded. i, however, am dreading it more than ever since i had just moved to a new town, which meant a new school. this also meant new people. new, judgmental people. i have decided that i'll just stay quiet and try to make at least one friend. maybe two, in case one gets sick. that'll be fine i just. . . don't want to be alone. but who would be the first person i meet? i think i'm pretty approachable, i look decent and i have not so bad conversation starters. but there's one problem.

i can't start conversations.

all because of my fucking stutter. i get caught up in what i'm saying and choke on my words. i hate it so damn much. why did i have to fuck up along the way and have a speech impediment? i think i've had it ever since i was young, and i didn't really get any better. but at least it's not too bad. sometimes, and i mean only some, i can say full sentences with big, smart sounding, sophisticated words. i get so happy for these few seconds. but other times, as soon as a word leaves my mouth, i don't know how to use my voice. my mom promised that we would find a doctor to help me but. . .

my train wreck of thoughts were interrupted when i heard helen say my name.

"philip?" she questioned, turning around in her seat as the car came to a stop, "we're here. gabe will take you home after alright?"

i merely nodded in response before grabbing my bag and slinging it over my shoulder while getting out. i waved at her as she drove away, leaving me alone. the one thing i didn't want to be.

the sounds of talking, and occasional yell, laughs, and everything else could be heard all around. i felt a few pairs of eyes on me as i slowly turned around. this was a small town after all, so i was an odd one out.

i started getting self conscious about how i walked up the stairs, which was weird to me. who even gets self conscious about walking?

i still felt someone's gaze on me as i looked up, and met eyes with a tall, blonde boy with a very "punk" like appearance. in the few seconds i looked at him, i noticed his lip ring on the bottom right side of his plump lips, an eyebrow piercing on his left eyebrow, and an all black attire. his skinny jeans had several rips, and his matching black korn shirt fit him perfectly. what amazed me the most about this hot stranger, was how he managed to find matching shades of black. can you believe that?

i looked back down at my feet as i began walking forward, deciding to swerve around him and hoping to see him in the hallways later on. that decision was altered when i started moving around the blonde boy, but was stopped by him grabbing my arm and pulling me toward him. his grip was tight, but not tight enough to hurt me. i was taken aback as i turned my head to look this guy in the eyes, but was intimidated. he had piercing, icy blue eyes that looked into my dull, brown eyes.

"you're not from here, huh?" his voice came out deep, smooth yet almost scratchy, and firm as he asked me the question.

i shook my head no, not really wanting to talk. this dude was hot as hell, and i didn't want to make a bad first impression.