I've never ever felt this safe before... it's like.. like I'm back at being home again with my family. I decided to stay at Derek's house for a while until I find a house my own. That's what I decided on.
I've also told Derek my story of Josh and I. The whole thing. He held me and started to cry a little for me. I don't know what his deal is with me. He cares too much.
He keeps on saying, "Y/n I'll never hurt you." I just look at him and say. "I know." He's a soft person inside. I've been staying with Derek for about 1 month and a half. And every time he does something to me I tense up. Like hug me.
Put his arm around me. Grab my hand. I don't know what it all means. Josh was my first ever love in my whole life. I don't know if he's ever showed love to me. But on to the point when Derek hugs me. I tense up. I'm so used to being hit but Josh or touched.
But every time I'm in Derek's arms. I feel the like I'm the most safest person in the world. Derek's like my care taker I guess you can say. He makes me food. He buys me these nice clothes. Nice undergarments and nice shoes.
I don't know where he gets all his money from. I'm wearing a spaghetti strap still showing some scars that were from Josh. I'm cuddled up with Derek watching a comedy movie. His thumb rubs my shoulder where one of my scars are.
"Y/n." I look over at Derek. "If I told you something crazy... would you still associate with me?" I give him a weird look. "Why would the question be crazy?" I ask. "Because we just met.." I tell him to carry on. "The thing is.." He sits up and faces me and I do the same.
He holds my hands. "I like you y/n, more than friends.. "I just don't know if you're ready for a relationship yet ya know." I look up and him and smile. "Just come to me when you're ready okay. I won't rush you." I lay down back at him and continue with the movie I feel him smile so big.
Later on we Finish the movie and go to our rooms.
I go laydown and think about the question Derek has asked me. I think. I think.. what am I thinking? Derek's makes it clear that he wants to take care of me. He's became attached to me. Josh has never showed any symptoms of those to me.
I think I'm staring to catch some feelings for Derek. I finally made up my mind. "I'm ready." I say quietly getting up from my bed. I walk out my door and go to Derek's. "Y/n?" I hear him say. Theres the light from the starry night shining directly on Derek's face. I walk towards him.
I pull the covers off of him and sit my self on his waist. "Derek.. I've thought about it.." I say as I intertwine our hands. "Guessing it's a yes huh?" He says. "Yup!" We laugh and we began to kiss later on turning into something passionate.
We done it for about 1 hour and a half.
"I made you some breakfast baby girl." I woke
up in a different place remembering last night. I smile. He sits by me shirtless with Tommy Hilfiger boxers on. "You look cute." I say. "Rather me look like this all the time now since you never give me compliments." We both laugh. Derek gives me the food. And sits by me while eating.
"I'm really glad you bumped into me and said yes.. and I'm sorry for bring that begging of the sentence up." I smile at him and swallow my food. "It's all okay because it's over now." He cups my cheeks and kisses me. God has answered my prayers after all.
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