Tyler's pale eyelids stretch to stay open above his chocolate eyes as he realizes just how long it's been since he's slept. He's sitting at his paper covered desk, his eyes beginning to feel the longing of sleep they've missed out on for more than four days. He knows it's unhealthy, but sleep is supposed to be a beautiful relief, the icing on top of your cake a of a day. Sleep is supposed to be the feeling of letting go, sleep is just a small coma, and Tyler is in love with the concept.
But for him, sleep is hell. And that, that is what frustrates him the most. He wants to sleep, but he doesn't want to close his eyes. He doesn't wanna fear the night anymore. He wants to be set free.
He looks at the clock, the time being an unsurprising 3:22.
His skin burns with the need for rest, the need for real sleep, as he wishes he could just sleep with his eyes open. He reluctantly gets up from his desk, his feet tingling from sitting down for so long.
-
As Friday approaches, Josh gets excited to sleep over at Tyler's, his mind playing out strings of different scenarios. He knows it's wrong to think of someone like that, but every time he thinks about Tyler's doe eyes, he can't help but get this feeling in his chest he can only explain with color.
Josh sits in his mahogany desk, his feet kicking the metal underneath. As he waits for his Geometry teacher to come through the door of dread, he hears distant voices. He turns his head to see a group of boys, all glancing at Josh, talking rather quietly. Josh feels a pang of anxiety hit his chest like a brick.
"What are you looking at, fag?" One of them says to the red headed boy, laughing with his friends as they high five him. Josh doesn't say anything, just turns around as he feels heat rise to his cheeks, his skin suddenly feeling too tight for his body.
He can't help but think of how much he wants to go home. He doesn't want to feel uncomfortable in his own skin.
He feels one of them walk up behind him, spitting, "Stand up."
All his friends are cracking up over the fact that the pale skinned boy is now flush white from fear. When Josh just tries to ignore him, he get's a worse response than intended.
"I said, STAND. UP." He spits, yanking the flame haired boy up by the neck of his shirt, the desk screeching as it was thrown back by Josh's feet. The jock is breathing a foul smell of breath into his face, his tall and athletic figure towering over Josh's rather small, shaking frame.
"Why are you so damn short? You're like 17, you shouldn't be looking like a shrimp," He says chuckling evilly as the shaking leaf of a boy tilting his face back to avoid anymore breath onto his hot face. Josh continued to stay silent, for he knew his words would just be like the gasoline to the fire.
At this point, everyone in the room was laughing hysterically, their heads tilted back as some even clapped their hands.
Josh's face was more than red at this point, his body physically reacting as if he'd just run a marathon.
His pale skin tingled in embarrassment, his mind wanting to desperately crawl out of his body, leaving his lifeless frame to fall to the floor. The heartless boy dropped him to the floor as everyone continued to laugh at him, and so he did what he felt was best.
He ran.
-
"What's up with you lately? You've been acting real weird, dude." Brendon asks as Tyler lazily throws his basketball into the net. The school gym always has this... smell, that Tyler is in love with. It reminds him of when things were easier.
"There's nothing wrong." Tyler tries to cover it up, he really does, but these days it's getting harder.
"Dude, you look like you haven't slept in days, and I haven't seen you eat at lunch either. Now, I'm gonna ask again. What's up with you?"
He doesn't answer at first, just flipping the ball around in his hands, staring at the cracks between the rubbery material as if the spaces will give him some sort of answer.
"Nothing, I've just not been sleeping to great lately. Our neighbors are sorta loud sometimes," He says before he's dribbling to the other side of the court, shooting yet another basket before walking toward the exit.
"I'm gonna go home Brendon, see you later." He shouts before he runs out the gym doors, avoiding any other questions.
He runs out the door to the exit of the school, hurrying outside to wait on Josh.
-
On the walk home with Josh, he gets the same butterflies that were there before, but this time much more intense. His foot absentmindedly decides to kick a small pebble all the way home when Josh speaks up.
"How was it today?" His voice is soft, not wanting to scare him. He hopes his question is just vague enough to get one of two answers.
"School was good, actually." He comments, his teeth coming to bite his lips.
"Good," Josh says, not exactly satisfied with the answer.
Tyler stops in his tracks, his hands settling in his coat pockets, looking out into the sunset.
"What is it?" Josh asks, curiosity lacing his voice like tinsel on a Christmas tree.
"Do you ever wonder what makes those colors in the sky? I mean, sure, it has something to do with reflection of light or something, but what really makes those colors? Why are they there just when the sun is going up or down? Maybe... Maybe some dead artist from 500 years ago paints the sky every night and morning," Tyler rambles as Josh does the opposite of what Tyler wants him to do. He expects him to look at the sunset and wonder the same, but the red headed boy is only staring at Tyler, watching his face light up at all the possible possibilities, cocking his pretty little head to the side- perhaps to view the pastel mesh in a different angle to get an answer.
"Yeah..." Josh trails, getting lost in the abyss of the brunette's eyes looking over the arrangement of colors created, and Josh wonders if it was created just for Tyler.
Tyler turns his head, darting his eyes to Josh, his skin tingling when he sees his eyes that look as if, perhaps, the same artist who paints the sky painted his eyes. His stomach lurches as he looks at Josh's lips, thinking of terrible, terrible things- or at least that's what people would call it.
When he looks back into his eyes, he sees this... flicker he's never seen before, almost like a spark.
"We should get home. It's super cold." Tyler says rather fast, the fear of want settling into his stomach a little too quickly.
