Trapped

|5|

           I woke up and twisted the doorknob and this time it was still locked. I don't even know why I bothered checking the door anymore.

          Knowing that I could be possibly pregnant 🤰 was horrible. I didn't want a child at 16 and I certainly didn't want his child. However, I was against abortions.. so if I am pregnant I guess I have to keep this child, and raise it on my own.. how am I going to raise a child on my own when I don't even have a place to stay? I can't even take care of myself. I'm only sixteen.. I have no where to go.

           My father's family hates me and my mother. They know it's my mother's fault that he's dead.. so their grief left them to hate me. My mom's side of the family is just as bad as her.          So, I basically have no family if you ask me. No one wants me.
       I need to get emancipated but I refuse to go back to that house to get any papers signed by my "mother". I don't even want to see her in a court room. I don't want to go to a foster home.. now that I think about it. I basically ran away from home, and for weeks my "mother" didn't call to check up on me, she didn't even file a missing person-report. she doesn't care about me. Believe it or not, as much as I hate her, It hurts to know your own birth mother hates you..
             She wasn't always like this. When my dad was alive we were a happy family. We didn't live in a crummy apartment. He had a well paying job, and she wasn't always drinking. We had a four bedroom house, my dad always talked about wanting more kids. Too bad he couldn't even get to see his only child grow up.
I wish that they lied to me about his death..                                     
             I wish he was out there somewhere hiding just to protect himself from Gary, my mom, and everyone that wants to harm him. I hope that one day he comes for me. I wish he was trapped, and escaped.. I just want to believe he really isn't dead.
• • •
* 2weeks later*
I hadn't eaten a good meal in weeks. He always brought me a water bottle and a bag of chips. My body all of a sudden has been feeling really weird. My back was sore and my breast felt so tender and sore everytime I laid down on my stomach or even hit them onto something. These last two weeks have been the same nonstop rape. He doesn't even care about me.. he just has sex with me for his own pleasure. Then he brings Christiana and they have sex loud enough for the whole world to hear it. If he has her why won't he leave me alone?
I heard him untwisting the door knob. He threw me a pregnancy test and my daily meal. Water and a bag of chips.
I sighed.
" how am I supposed to take the test?"
I haven't even showered in these past two weeks. I need to shave and wash up. He won't let me. He just walks me to the bathroom and watches me pee to make sure I don't run anywhere. He won't let me take showers because he says doesn't have time to watch me take long showers.
Hygiene is so important to me, and he's just making me feel so icky. I can smell my odor.. I don't feel like myself at all. I've never been this disgusted with myself.
           I plopped myself back down on the bed, and stared at the roof. I started to just pick stuff in my bag. One day, I'll be able to just grab the bags and run. He unlocked the door and pulled me out and into the bathroom.
" take the test now ."
          I took the test and it came up positive. When Shaun noticed that he began to punch me in my face. Everywhere but my stomach, and I wasn't understanding why. He threw me back in the room, and rushed out.
         This time he forgot to lock the room door. I finished packing my bags and took a quick shower. Quick enough to get the odor off me. I'll shave when I leave this place. I ran out the basement back door with my bags, and to the subway. I had nowhere else to go besides to live with my mother. So, I did what any homeless teen that ran away from home would do— well most— I went back home.
         I banged on the door, and my mom open the door half naked. A man that was lightskin, and had dreads came behind her. That was certainly not Gary.
"  what the fuck do you want? "
" I came back here. " I said lowly
" you wanna be grown and move out then you can stay out bitch. Nobody was worrying about you. You look terrible. Should've stayed where you've been. Damn, you have sex one time and you wanna run out. Bitch woman up. I don't even know why Gary had sex with you but if it got you out of my sight for a few weeks then I'm happy he supposedly raped you. "
I didn't feel like arguing with her I just brushed pass her and walked inside , went to my room and locked the door. Usually at times like this I'd be at verge of tears, but I'm all cried out. I don't even feel like crying, I'm just fed up with everything. I put a pillow over my ears and I still continued to hear her moaning. I wonder what happened to Gary. I could careless though. I'm already pregnant what else could possibly go wrong?
        I took a long shower, shaved, washed my hair, and removed all the dirt particles I felt on my body. Every place that Shaun touched on my body I scrubbed it long and hard. I felt so much better.
         I threw on a pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt. I went to the kitchen and roamed through the empty refrigerator.
        I was so hungry, and she didn't even have anything. The fridge was empty. I know for fact that her EBT card was stacked with cash but instead she sold the cards for money. I sighed and went back to my room. Making sure to lock the door everytime! I don't want any of her male friends coming in my room.
     * two weeks later *
             Living with my mom hasn't been pleasant at all. She's still the same mean ole bastard. She's been taking drugs, and she has been having all types of men in and out of here. I think she's having sex with them to pay for her drugs. It's quite disgusting. She always tries to bring me around them, but I don't like men.. I feel like they all want to harm me. So I stay far away from them.
     " shya come here " my mom yelped as if she were in pain 
I hurried into her room and there were two men with guns pointing my mother's head.
" mama is going to die if you don't help me shya "
I just stared at her. What could I possibly do? If anything we're both going die.
" just have sex with this one over please. " she pointed to a boy with a mask on his face. He took his mask off and it was Shaun.
" no. " I said loudly
      This time one of the guns was facing me. Shaun smirked at me and laughed.
" you know she got a banging ass body, we would definitely make a lot of money with her. " another man said referring to me
    Make a lot of money? What were they talking about? I'm not a damn item.
" you can take her. The price to buy her would be the amount I owe y'all. Just don't kill me. "
        Next thing I knew I was being snatched up and thrown into a truck. I tried to yell , but they muffled my mouth up and put something to my nose. After smelling that I was out like a light.