I've been in the home gym now for almost a week. I just can't find it in me, to go and talk to Louis about what happened or even forgive him at the moment. Whenever he's been home, he has been sitting outside the door begging for me to come out, telling me how sorry he is over and over again. This time though, after everything we went through, I'm finding it hard to forgive him.
I just feel lost and confused. I knew that he couldn't love both sides of me! I knew it all too well but still I told the whole world my secret for him! I forgave him more times than I can count for him! I did everything in my power to get him back when I lost him for fucking him! And he just can't accept me for who I am. I fought for him so much and he can't even do the same for me!
"Marcy? Please come out! You're going to get sick being stuck in there!" Louis sighed, once again sitting outside the door.
I wiped away the tears and sighed. He was right I couldn't stay in here forever but I could sure try! I just ignored him as he started to once again bang on the door, shouting my name.
"Fine! I messed up I know I did Marcy! But I'm only human...I didn't fucking mean it. Of course I love you and I love you even when you act more like Harry and even when you act like like Marcel. I love you and only you! So please baby! It was a mistake, I was angry and you were angry. I just said it without thinking."
I looked at the door in front of me, knowing well that Louis probably had his back against it, running his hand through his hair frustrated with our situation. Nothing went right with us. We were never happy for long. It only seemed to last a few hours tops before we started shouting at each other and fighting. I couldn't help but feel like I was ready to give up on us, on him, on our relationship. Honestly it barely felt like a relationship anymore.
It just felt like two people living under the same roof, who are pretending to be in love with each other for god knows what messed up reasons each of them have. I had no idea what to do, what I should say. For once, I couldn't think of a single word to yell back at him. I was sick of this, sick of thing Louis and I decided to call love because it doesn't fucking look like love to me.
Then there are the boys who always comment on how much we love each other. They always say that they can see it in our eyes, when we look at each other or when we gaze at one another from different sides of the room. Liam always chuckles a bit before he says this "It's amazing how much you love each other. It's like you're the thunder and Louis is the lightning. You need each other to be heard and seen because rarely is thunder not accompanied by lightning and the other way around."
I have no idea where he came up with that, but when I first heard it, it made me fall for Louis all over again but who knows, I've heard countless people say that the spark has gone and maybe that's what happened to us. Just the mere thought that, that is what probably happened to us brought tears to my eyes. The person I put such a fight for, that I almost died over, and it feels like I don't even know him.
"Lou?" I whispered, leaning onto the door.
"Yes Marcy?" He asked.
"Do, do you think the spark is gone?" I whispered, my voice cracking at the end.
"Of course not. We still have a spark Marcy! Don't be silly." He said.
I slowly opened the door and peaked out of it, to see Louis standing there with a small smile gracing his features. I stepped out the room and couldn't help to look him up and down. He was right, it wasn't gone, because whenever I looked at it, those butterflies still appeared in my stomach and I could never stop smiling, because of him! The reason why I'm still alive? Because of him! I can still smile and keep my head up high, even with these scars marking my arms because of him!
I walked up to him and hugged him so tight, just in case he would try and run away from me. He already did it once and I'm not letting him do it again!
"I got a surprise for you." He smiled as he held me at arms length.
"What is it?" I asked, curious to see what it was.
I watched as he lifted the sleeve of his shirt up to reveal a heart on his upper arm. I looked at it for a minute before I met his eyes and he was grinning.
"You got a tattoo?" I asked astonished.
"Yeah! You like it?" He smiled, flexing his arm and making weird faces as he did.
"Yeah, I do! Who is it for though?"
"It's for you silly." He smirked, poking my nose lightly.
"Really? Wow!" I said, as I gently traced it.
He just pulled me into a massive bear hug again and kissed my temple.
"I love you so much." He whispered into my ear. I grinned as I pulled back a little to look at him straight in the eyes.
"I love you too, more than anything."
I guess, we haven't lost our spark. It was still there, in every way and form. He loved me and I loved him just as much. We might have a rocky relationship but it's what makes us, well us! I mean, if we managed to stay together for two years, fighting what felt like every two seconds, I'm sure we can stay together forever. Especially since Louis made a promise to me, two years ago, and he has kept it ever since!
A/N: Well obviously next time I say that I'm taking a break from writing Stronger, you all shouldn't believe me!! I'M LYING!!! The minute I said I was putting it on hold, I just wanted to continue it, so that's what I did XD Changing my mind much?? Yes, yes I am!! But anyway I love you all and thank you for the support! Baii xx
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Stronger *Trilogy* (Larcel/Larry)
Teen FictionHighest Rank: #18 in Larcel Marcel felt like the happiest man on earth since he had everything he ever wanted. He had his boxing career, he had great friends and on top of all that he had Louis Tomlinson, the boy who he had fallen in love with. Two...