Chapter 13 - He really put his dick in it this time

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When I was discharged Andy offered to drive me home. Every fibre of my being wanted to reject him, never see him again but I didn't have the money for a cab and he was the only one who offered. I stared out the window the whole time, not giving him the satisfaction of timidity. Instead of taking me to my dad's house he drove me to a quiet cul-de-sac and pulled up outside a small two story house that had a little front garden with a white fence around it.

"What's this?" I asked.

Andy handed me a key, "Your place."

"My place?" I breathed.

He nodded, "You were right all along. I want to take care of you."

"Why?" I asked.

"Because I care about you," he replied, "And I care about our children."

I felt the anger bubbling, "You can't just buy my forgiveness. You left me when I needed you..."

"Look I know!" He cried, "Jesus fuck I reacted badly ok. There is stuff going on that you don't know about so we can't be together but god knows I need to know you are safe."

"What do you can sleep at night?" I tutted.

"No because like it or not I still love you," he shot back, "To think everything that has happened to you has been my fault kills me. I want to at least try and make this shit train right. I know I don't deserve your forgiveness, fuck me I don't blame you if you hate me but..."

"Thank you," I whispered. The anger stowed away. He was trying. That's what mattered, "What is this place?"

He swallowed, "I brought it as a rental property when we first moved back. The renovations were done by me and a friend of mine."

I nodded slowly, "I can't pay..."

He shook his head, "I don't expect you to," he unclipped his seat belt, "Want to go inside?"

I smiled weakly, "Sure."

Inside was small but perfect. We walked straight into to living room which was already furnished with two red sofas and a tv in the wall with a small coffee table in the centre. Andy said all the rooms were white as he didn't know what colours I would want. The kitchen was a glossy black and already was stocked with a few bits of food as well as cutlery and red tea-towels and red mugs, bowls and plates. A small wooden dining table stood in the middle of the room. Upstairs had a small bathroom in white tile and black flooring with a plain white bathroom suite as well as two bedrooms. The first one we came to was a small one with a single crib in it with a mobile above it and a peak in the corner.

"Don't worry. I have two more cribs coming," Andy said, "You will be ready for our babies."

I smiled. He had thought of everything. He then led me next door to my bedroom. It had a standard double bed, wardrobe and chest of drawers. There were a few pair of clothes in there to start me off. The bedding was dark red, which seemed a theme in the house alone with white. I felt like crying.

"Andy it's beautiful," I breathed, "Thank you so much!"

Without even thinking, I kissed him. He didn't stop me. He curled his arms around me and pulled me close and I obliged. I didn't want this moment to end, I wanted him to hold me and kiss me like he was no for all eternity. I knew I shouldn't, I should hate him but I couldn't. I didn't forgive him but I felt so alone in this world that was starting to get more daunting. I needed someone on my team.

"Stay with me tonight," I pleaded.

He sighed, "Sam I can't..."

"Please," I begged. I felt tears prick my eyes, "I'm not asking you to because I want to be a mistress or anything, I'm asked because I'm scared of being alone."

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