Bring It On Home- A Destiel AU [COMPLETED]

Chapter 22

In hindsight, Dean definitely knew better than to invite them all over at once.

They were adults though, right? Was it too much to ask that the four or so people Dean was on a first name basis with all be in the same room together and get along nicely?

Apparently, it was.

Jeff and Laura were the first to show up, bearing Caesar salad and a sixpack of beer. "Get ready to party like it's 1999!" Jeff joked. Dean laughed and introduced them to Sam. Sam, for his part, was the perfect blend of polite and casual, reserved but relaxed. Jeff and Laura melted like butter. Sam had always been good at that.

Dean hadn't told Jeff and Laura about Sam's addiction. He didn't want any bad blood. It was in the past. Besides, it was Sam's story to tell. Jeff helped Dean set the table and Sam put the beer in the fridge and joked with Laura about Dean's taste for Miller Lite, and the pizza came out of the oven perfectly golden crisped and everything was going swimmingly.

And then Cas showed up, and it all went to hell.

It started the moment he knocked and immediately swung open the door to let himself in. Jeff and Laura exchanged a glance, mild terror frozen on their faces, and Dean could almost hear their backs stiffening, their throats clenching, their knuckles going white.

Maybe it was because of Cas's kilt. But then, it was probably his black feather boa.

"Hello," Cas said, thrusting forth a foil-wrapped plate in one hand.

Jeff and Laura regarded the plate with further stifled terror.

"Jeff, Laura." Dean chuckled nervously and clapped his hands together. "Have you met my neighbor Castiel?"

To Laura's credit, she stepped forward bravely and offered her hand. "I don't think we've been formally introduced. I'm Laura, and this is my husband Jeff."

Cas shook her hand firmly. "I'm Castiel, and this is my husband Omar." He looked down at his plate. "No, wait - my mistake. These are just breadsticks."

Laura giggled with wide eyes and a plastered smile, a hysterical edge to sound. Jeff stared.

"It was a joke," Cas reassured them. "Don't worry, I know the difference between breadsticks and a husband. For one, our state allows me to have breadsticks."

"HOOookay, what a kidder." Dean stepped forward and took the plate, which he handed to Sam. "Sam, why don't you take these to the kitchen?" He turned back to Cas. "And I'll just help you hang up your... scarf here-"

"It's a boa, Dean," Cas corrected.

Dean glared.

Cas swished the feathery end of the thing. "See? Boa."

Thank God Sam finally stepped back in and said, "Hey, Jeff and Laura, want to help me-" Before he could even finish his sentence, a grateful Jeff and Laura were scurrying into the other room and away from the junkie in drag.

Dean yanked open the hall closet. "You couldn't leave it alone, could you, had to make sure they knew it was a fucking boa," he hissed, scowling at Cas.

Cas slid off the boa and lackadaisically hung it up. "It is what it is, Dean. I don't see the problem."

"The problem is that I ask you to make nice and be normal once - just once -" Dean pointed one finger for emphasis - "and you show up in a skirt, Cas! You couldn't even wear pants?"

Cas looked down, as though he hadn't really noticed what he'd put on. "It's a kilt. Cultural heritage, Dean."

Dean dragged his hand down his face. "Just - dial it down tonight, will you? Pretend like you're a human being. Can you do that?"

Cas frowned. "I am a human being. And if I'm going to continue associating with you, and you're going to continue associating with them, I don't see the point in hiding who I am. They'll find out sooner or later."

Dean sighed and briefly closed his eyes. "Please, Cas. For me."

Cas's breath ghosted across his ear, sending a shiver up Dean's neck, and in a low, rough voice he said, "I agreed not to tell them about us. But I didn't agree to make it easy on you."

When Dean opened his eyes, Cas was halfway to the kitchen.

Dean closed the hall closet door. Fine. If Cas wanted to fight dirty, well. Two could play that game.