Lovesick Fool (A Ross Lynch FanFiction)

I Hate Everybody - Chapter 10

JESS' POV:

I woke up happy. I woke up with my head on Ross' chest with his arms around my body, our legs tangled. I was smiling for all of 5 minutes until I remembered what happened. I remembered that Spencer and I broke up. I sighed as I wiggled out of Ross' grasp and walked to the bathroom, careful not to wake anybody up. I looked in the mirror at my pale appearance. Since my skin was so sickly and white the redness around my eyes stood out due to the contrast. I splashed my face with water, hoping it would help in some way. But it didn't. When I walked back to the bedrooms I noticed Ross was now awake.

"Hey." He whispered. I just nodded. I couldn't bring myself to speak or to even smile.

"Are you hungry? Do you want to get breakfast?" I knew he was just trying to help. But right now I didn't want to see anybody. I shook my head and lay next to him in the bed. The propped up pillow supporting my back. I was finally getting some silence when my phone went off, notifying me that I had a text. I didn't answer it, I didn't care anymore. But then I started getting more and more texts. The noise was starting to wake everybody up. I slowly used all of my remaining strength to pick up my damn phone to see what was so important. Being heartbroken was physically draining, I felt like I couldn't do anything, I probably didn't have enough energy to text back. I had 6 or 7 texts from people I knew from school saying things like

"You and Spencer broke up???" And "Who did you cheat on Spencer with?" I turned my phone on silent and threw it somewhere, not really caring if it broke.

"I hate everybody." My voice was shaky, like I hadn't talked for a thousand years. Well obviously I didn't hate everybody but I didn't care enough to correct myself. I'll just let Ross, Rocky, Rydel, Riker and Ratliff think that I hate them. They all left me alone for about half an hour.

"We're going to get breakfast." Ross told me softly "If you want to come." I shook my head.

"Do you want us to get you anything?" Rydel asked. I shook my head. When they left I started crying, only when they left. I found my phone, stuck my earphones in and listened to sad songs.

I closed my eyes and thought about all of the good times me and Spencer had. I thought about when we first met in ninth grade. He was in my homeroom, it was math. It was about a month into school and I was sat next to him in the front because I wouldn't stop talking. I corrupted him and within days I had him joking around and laughing with me. We were the class "couple" even though we weren't dating. It was one of those relationships where everyone knew we were flirting but us. I thought about the cute, quiet, smart boy he was when I first met him, he would never hurt a fly I never thought he would hit me. I cried harder at the thought.

I rolled over to Ross' side of the bed and hid my face in his pillow. It smelled like him, like the ocean mixed with soap. It smelled like home. I tried to convince myself that I only liked Ross because I was homesick and he reminded me of home and that I could get back together with Spencer because he was wrong, because I didn't like Ross. The key word in that was tried. It didn't work, this was when I fully realized that I was falling for Ross. I pushed those thoughts away from my head and returned my thoughts to Spencer, making me cry harder, probabaky getting leftover make up from yesterday on Ross' pillow.

I didn't even realize I fell asleep until I was shaken awake.

"Hey Jess." Rydel forced a smile to me. "It's seven o clock and we just came back from dinner. We brought you some food." She pointed to the table. I slowly crained my neck to see what they got. Ross was sitting at the table eating some Chinese noodles sitting up from a another bowl, that I guess was for me.

"Didn't Ross eat with you?" I blinked, my voice was barely a whisper.

"No he stayed here with you all day incase you woke up." She smiled. The corners of my mouth quirked up a bit, but that was all my mind and body were letting me do. I was hungry but I don't know if I'll be able to eat any food without throwing up. I got up for Ross though. I hobbled over to the place that was set for me. I picked at my food at first, trying to decide if I should eat it or not.

"Come on Jessie." Ross said with noodles falling out of his mouth. Normally this would've made me laugh and I would've called Ross an idiot. But I felt dead inside, like I was empty. Like when Spencer hit me, he made my soul fall out of my ear. I was just a shell, if Ross couldn't make me show even the tiniest of emotion than no one could. I could never love anyone again, I was going to die an empty, friendless shell. Eventually people, even Ross will stop trying and I'll be all alone. This brought tears to my eyes. I stood up, abondoning my noodles and went back to bed, where I stayed until we had to leave Paris.

A/N SORRY THIS WAS SO SHORT, I WANTED TO GET AN UPDATE IN BEFORE WINTER BREAK ENDED. SO YEAH I WONT BE UPDATING AS FREQUENTLY BECAUSE SCHOOL WILL BE STARTING UP AGAIN AND SO WILL DANCE. I'LL TRY TO UPDATE IT AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE BUT IM SORRY IN ADVANCE. NOT THAT ANYBODY ACTUALLY CARES LOL.