Damn You [BoyxBoy]

Lucky Ones

Song: Lucky Ones - Lana Del Rey (I prefer the demo, but it's Lana, so both versions are amazing)

"We should get to school," Jeremy says, showing me the time on his phone. It's hard to believe we've missed 2 hours of school, just getting breakfast. I guess you loose track of time when your with someone like Jeremy. I know, I know, we've only been friends for less than a day, and he kissed me. You could say that we're moving fast, but I really don't mind. I don't mind one bit having his lips on mine, or the way his eyes watch me intently. It drives me nuts. It makes me feel electric.

But I also know that I hurt Sean. Even if I just kissed him once, I think he thought that maybe we could be more than just... a player and a coach. But no. It can't happen. It won't happen. Besides, I don't feel the same way towards him as I do with Jeremy.Sure, Sean is handsome - incredibly handsome - but I feel like something is missing with him. Jeremy makes my insides feel warm and lovely, while with him, they burn. Maybe it's because I know that we can't be together, or just simply because I don't like-like him. I sound like a kindergartner, I think.

"You got that look in your face again," says Jeremy. His eyes stare at my face, but not in an awkward way, but in a caring sort of way; like he's making sure I'm alright.

Trying to look away from his face, I ask, "What look?"

He gets up from his chair, signaling me that it's time to go, and he tells me, "That look you get when you're thinking. You always look either confused, strangely happy, or plain sad." At the last emotion, he frowns, like he doesn't like the fact that I'm said, which only makes me want to jump towards him and hug him. Maybe it's the name calling, insults, or retorts, that hide this sensitive side of Jeremy from me. It's like he's a whole other person.

We reach my car, and once we're inside, we drop the previous conversation for a new one. "How old is Coach Greyson?" I ask Jeremy, hoping he doesn't notice how I'm playing with my fingers nervously. He furrows his eyebrows and thinks for a moment. "Why?" he asks.

I turn on the car and respond, trying to act nonchalant, "Just a question."

I look at him from the corner of my eye. He shrugs, "I think he's 27."

At least he's not over thirty, right? A 30 year old kissing a High School'er would be worse , right? Twenty-seven isn't that bad. Right?

"Why?" I ask Jeremy, not adding onto it. He looks confused- a look that's common on his face.

"What'd you mean?" he says, turning the radio up to were its background noise.

"Why did you kiss me..." I ask him. Just saying that sounds so surreal. Not once did I think I'd be kissing a guy. Especially if that guy was Jeremy: the person who I thought hated me since 6th grade. But something about it all connects. Even though I ignored it, I always noticed that Jeremy and I had similarities. People had mentioned it, too, but I just blew them off saying that he was a heartless, douchebag jerk. In my defense, I didn't really know him back then. I was blind as to how fun he was, how romantic, and how... great he is.

"I felt like," he simply says, shrugging.

"You just felt like kissing me? A guy. Who a few days back you used to call a fag," I state a little too harshly.

He visibly cringes. He breaths heavily before spitting out, "Look, I know that I shouldn't have bullied you like that. I'm sorry. Back then, I didn't feel this way towards you. I didn't feel the urge to kiss you. I didnt-"

"Then what changed?" I ask, not looking at him. We reach a red light, and I brake and finally look at him. He doesn't answer my question, he just looks at me for a second before lunging across the car, grabbing the back of my neck, and planting his lips on mine. Unlike the previous kisses, this one is rough; like we are hungry for each other. And something about this kiss just makes me feel alive.