The Other Side

2 •Unsteady

Everything was black and sounds were muffled, suffocating me, coming from every direction. For a second I thought I might be dead, but then the loud mess of noises began to separate, and I could make out a woman's voice.

"Adam, you know you don't have to do this. You know it."

Feeling suicidal. Unsure. Unsure what to do. Everything's gone. She's gone. Why would she leave me here, alone, suffering.

"She's gone, she's gone!" Crying out my tears.

I couldn't feel anything. I felt as if I'd been shot. The only think still keeping me here is the woman's voice, my mom. She was screaming at me from the back asking me to come back. I was unsure.

"ADAM! YOURE DOING A STUPID DECISION AND YOU KNOW IT. DONT DO IT. DONT BE STUPID. DONT BE IGNORANT. COME BACK TO ME."

I looked at her. She looked back. Running towards me, she gave me a hug as I cried on her shoulders. Now what? What do I do?

*Back home*

"Hey, you did the right thing Adam, and you know it."

"I'm going to bed"

Back home, looking at my room, this was where it all started. Where we first met. I fell on my bed staring helplessly at my ceiling.

Now what? It's all over.

Everything for me now is over, I just feel the whole universe is against me.
I'm not being childish or anything. Do you know how it feels losing the person you love just like that.

I walked slowly to the bathroom, and saw a small box near the counter. Is this fate? Is this what I was meant to do?. I opened it and saw a sharp blade. Just by looking at it, brought me back so many memories. I was depressed back then, before I met Kayle. Once she stepped into my life, all darkness fade away. She made me feel happy.

"Is this it? Am I suppose to end myself. IS THIS IT!"

I swing my hand breaking my mirror into a pieces. At this point, pain was nothing. I thought after I met Kayle, I would be clean, but guess not. She was the one who made me happy, not suicidal. But now, she's gone. There's nothing else for me to be happy for. Its now or never.

I took the sharp blade and swiftly slide it through my arms.

"Oh gosh."

The feelings, I somehow missed it. Memories started flooding. Is this is? Am I now unsteady without her?

""ADAM! WHAT ARE YOU DOING"

The door swing open as I heard my best friend shouting.

He grabbed me by my arms and pushed me away from the blade.

"WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING"

"WHAT ARE YOU NOW? SUICIDAL BECAUSE SHE'S GONE? WAKE UP ADAM!"

I looked at him pitifully as I started loosing my vision my tears bursting out. I couldn't help it. What more to make me happy. She's gone.

"I KNOW JOHN. I'm sorry. I didn't think" I just said that to bring the matter down.

"ADAM! YOURE DOING A STUPID DECISION AND YOU KNOW IT. DONT DO IT. DONT BE STUPID. DONT BE IGNORANT. COME BACK TO ME."

Was this it? Is this how it was suppose to go? Me being unsteady from now onwards? Me not thinking straight.

He continued shouting at me as I blindly looked around. All I could here were ringing. I felt someone was stabbing me from my back a hundred million times.

"adam..Adam..ADAM!! I'm sorry ok, I over reacted. I shouldn't have shouted at you. You know I was just protective." As I got back my sanity, his voice started echoing back.

The voices in my head were screaming. They kept on repeatedly saying to end. To end it all. Once ended, freedom.

"You can see her again Adam, just cut urself" as the voices in my head started to get worse.

"ADAM! Stay here, I'm getting your mom."