lighter || phan au || prequel to cold

c h a p t e r // t w o

the next time we meet i'm even more confused.

"what's your name, cutie?" the girl next to me at the bar says. she runs her fingers up my arm, which does nothing but make me want to take a shower.

"d-dan" i stutter. "i, um, i . . ."

i want to tell her i have a girlfriend, just to get rid of her, but i can't make my mouth say the words.

"i'm clare" she says, tilting her head and grinning. she's trying to be cute, i think. but it's not working and i'm not interested in her the same way i wasn't interested in any of the girls in my secondary school, or in college, or in university.

"do you want to go somewhere more, ahm, private?" she asks, batting her eyelashes and scooting her bar stool even closer to mine.

"um, ah, let's dance!" i say, louder than i mean to, because under no circumstances do i want to sleep with this girl. she looks disappointed for a moment, but then shrugs, and grabs my hand, pulling me onto the dance floor.

it's packed with bodies and at least five degrees hotter than it was at the bar. she gets as close to me as she can, grinding against me to the beat of the song playing. i don't move.

i don't know what to do.

until someone's hand slides into mine.

"fancy seeing you here!" he shouts over the music. "it's been awhile, shall we catch up then?" i don't answer but i nod and he pulls me away from her and back to the bar.

i collapse onto a stool.

"dan, right?" he says, still shouting over the music. "you looked like you needed a rescue, mate. everything alright?"

"i just, she, um, she was . . . i wasn't interested" i manage. i'm sure my face is bright red. i run a hand through my hair for something to do besides avoid staring at him.

"yeah, your eyes were practically screaming 'help'" he says. "but anyway, i'm here now! your knight in shining armour!" he places his hands on his hips and puffs his chest out comically. i laugh, softly at first, but then he starts laughing and it's like it's infectious, and then we're both practically crying laughing.

"i know i don't look like i could bench press a flea, but you could at least try to look convinced" he says, between gasps, after we've stopped laughing quite so hard.

"you've already saved me once, i'd say you're convincing" i say. he smiles, but there's an odd look on his face. like he's just recognised me or something. like he just realised i'm someone he's been looking for.

and then it's gone and i'm sure i was just imagining it.

"well, i'm glad i was around to help" he says. "i've got to be off now. but we've met twice, maybe we'll meet again. bye, dan!" he jumps off his stool, waves cheerily, and then disappears into the crowd.

"bye, phil!" i call after him.

then it occurs to me that i could follow him. that i don't have to let this stranger disappear into the crowd.

that i could get his number.

but by the time i get outside, he's already gone.