Dreams Do Come True

My quiet spot

I get up and empty out my backpack. I let the schoolbooks laying down on the floor and fill up the backpack with some other things. I take my phone, a raincoat, a sketchbook, some pens and pencils and the notebook from my mom.I write a note for Mason:' Will be back tonight. Don't stay up, could get quite late. x Anna' I put it down on my pillow. I go downstairs and sneak into the kitchen. I grab a sandwich and a bottle of water. I quietly sneak out the backdoor and start walking. I quickly get bored and put my headphones in. As the music plays, I walk down the street, walking towards the one spot that will empty and fill my mind at the same time. A spot that has meaning to me. A spot that reminds me of things. A spot that will, hopefully, help me. I really need to sort things out. Sort out my thoughts. Sort out my life.

I walked for a couple of hours and finally arrive. The bridge. I walk to the spot it happened. The spot where I hung over the railing, ready to let go. Right next to it, there's a thick metal bar sticking out a bit. It reminds me of a diving board. I crawl over the railing and carefully sit down on the edge of the bar. I feel a lot less scared this time. The place feels familiar now, although I've only been here once before. And we all know how that ended. 

I take off my backpack and take out some of my stuff. There's room enough to put it all around me, but I still try to be very careful. I don't want anything to fall down into the water. I place my back against the pole behind me. I'm surprisingly comfortable up here. I have a nice view over the water and the city. I take out my sketchbook and start drawing. I draw the view I'm looking at, because I don't want to ever forget this. It's amazing. I feel so confident. So happy. So alive. 

About an hour has passed and my drawing is starting to look pretty good, if I say so myself. I want to take the sandwich out of my backpack as I see the notebook. I take it out and look at it for a moment. I have no idea what to expect from this. What if there are horrible things in here? What if-... Stop asking yourself questions, Anna. Just open it. 

I softly rub my hand across the cover of the notebook. The golden letters come out a bit. I let my fingertips go over the bumps. It feels nice. I open the book. 

Dear Anna,

If you're reading this, that means you're moving out. I want you to flip through this notebook from time to time and remember all the fun things you did. When you're missing home, I hope this little book will help you get trough. 

Don't let anyone stop you from accomplishing your dreams. 

Love,
Mom

I turn over the first page and see a bunch of photo's of me when I was just born. My mom's holding me. She's smiling. I haven't seen her that happy since she started drinking. My dad, brother and sister are there as well. Everyone looks happy. As I flip through, I can see myself growing up. A baby, a toddler, a little kid, a pre-teenager, a teenager. There are some very recent photo's in here. From my last birthday, last Christmas. It's all in there. I can't help but start smiling. There are still some blank pages left. I'll fill them in myself. I want to finish this book about my childhood. It's not over yet, I mean.. I'm fourteen. I take out my sketchbook and start tracing my drawing into the notebook. It's the start of my own chapter. 

When I'm done, I close the book and pull it close to me. I don't want to lose it. I stare at the water beneath me. When I look up I can see a beautiful sunset. WAIT! Sunset!? What time is it? I take out my phone. It's 6.57. I can feel my stomach starting to hurt. I haven't eaten anything after breakfast yet. I put all of my stuff in my backpack and take out the sandwich. I walk off the bridge, eating my dinner. When I pass John's home, I wave at him. He looks happy and waves back. I walk next to the water. I love how the sun reflects on the surface. I can't remember ever feeling this happy and calm.