Paranoid (A Harry Styles Fanfic)

This Is Not The End

*Harry's POV*

Everyday its the same thing. The same pattern. The same ache in my chest that's so deep I can feel it in my bones. Everyday, I woke up, forgetting that she wouldn't be next to me. That she'd never be next to me again. The same crushing feeling that I was falling farther and farther into a darkness i could not escape from, and it never got easier. I would find myself staying up til all hours of the night, thinking about things that i was too scared to admit to myself. That her death was my fault, If only i hadn't been so blind.

After my fit of rage, I got up out of the remains of the people we used to be, and paced around the apartment. More desperate for something to take my mind off of everything than I was before. I found a few things that occupied me, but the thoughts always found a way back in, and I eventually ran out of things to keep myself sane.

I had the desire to run again. Despite the blisters and the heaviness my body felt I remembered when I first found out that she had died I ran, and it seemed to keep the pain away if only for a little while. At this point I was desperate for a realese, anything that would give me relief from all the anger, guilt, regret, and not to mention the crushing depression, that I felt.

So, without giving it a second thought, I burst through the door. Practically flying down the stairs and sprinting down the street. The opposite direction of where my mother, and now my girlfriend, had committed suicide. The soles of my feet instantly throbbed and ached, not quite ready to endure this kind of abuse again. But, eventually, they became numb, just like the rest of me had. I was back to being nothing, and right now that's exactly what I wanted.

I must've only ran a few blocks when I came across me and sawyer's favorite diner, Linemen's. It was a quaint small restaurant made to look like it belonged in the 50's. I slowed my sprint to a walking pace, and then to a complete stop. I stared up at the curly lit up letters of one of our favorite places and felt the familiar need to have a little something that still connected me to her.

I hesitantly walked through the glass door of the establishment and let the warm smell of burgers and fries surround me, a smell that I had come to love but now felt so empty, because nothing was the same without Sawyer there.

I walked with my head hanging down, not wanting my eyes to cross the place were we always sat. I took a seat up at the empty bar, and stared aimlessly at the menu. Not having the appetite to eat any of the things i used to love.

I looked up to meet the eyes of one of Sawyer and I's good friend, Glenn. He worked at the diner and also coincidentally looked like he belonged in the 50's, we had come to love and trust the old man. But instead of the normal look of happiness that he usually wore, it was a look of great concern.

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* The night before the death of Sawyer Collins*

*Glenn's POV*

It was a dark and rainy Friday night and although I knew that we wouldn't have costumers due to the weather I still decided to come in. 23 years I had worked at this diner and I had never missed a day of work, needless to say I wasn't about to start now.

I had busied myself with cleaning. We were usually very busy so there weren't many occasions where we could do any organizing and at the moment, we were in desperate need of it. The rain suddenly began to pound on the windows, turning from a slight rain shower to a torrential downpour. I hurried over and flipped the open sign to closed. The building was old and I became worried that the aging foundation would not be able to take such a severe storm.

As I was gathering my things to leave, the bell that indicated someone had entered the establishment rang. Expecting that the strong wind was to blame I hastily turned around, only to find a dark figure standing in the front of the small diner. The stranger was dressed in all black from head to toe, clothes soaked through from the rain. As I was about to grab something to defend myself the figure pulled its hood down, to reveal none other than a frantic looking Sawyer Collins.

I remembered her from the countless times her and her boyfriend Harry had come in. They were a lovely couple who seemed to always be happy. We had become good friends and frequently chatted when they came and ate here. But at this moment Sawyer seemed far from happy, in fact, she seemed afraid.

"Sawyer?" I called out to her, it seemed that I had saw her before she had saw me.She jumped slightly and then her eyes met mine. "Glenn." she seemed relieved.She hurried over and took my hand, pulling me over to one of the empty booths.

"Listen Glenn, I don't have much time so I have to talk quick. There are some things that people should never find out. Things that people will kill to keep hidden. Things that are worth risking everything to discover. I don't know when and I don't know how but sometime soon I'm going to be taken, and Harry is the only one who will be able to save me. Not the police, not the swat team, Harry. I know what hes going to be going through when he finds out I'm gone. Hes gonna feel helpless and scared and hes not gonna have the will to fight. But it is so important that you tell him to keep going. Tell him to look a little bit closer, to pay more attention. He's going to have to push through the depression and sadness clouding his eyes because if he doesn't I'm not going to get out of this alive. This is not the end. But he has to keep fighting. There are evil dark people in this world, but Harry is stronger than them. He is smarter than them. He can do this, if only he notices the things that don't seem to be there."

She stared deeply into my eyes. Her own now filled with tears, pleading.

I stood up from my seat and closed my eyes, pacing around the small area, thinking what the best thing to say next was. But, when they re-opened the room was empty. She had disappeared just as quick as she had arrived.

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*Present Time At The Diner*

*Harry's POV*

The old man stared at me a long while before I finally decided to speak.

"Don't look at me like that, I already know what you're thinking. Before you ask the most obvious question, yes. Sawyer is dead, and before you ask the second most obvious question, no I am not okay."

Glenn, shook his as if to snap himself into reality. He went from a look of concern to a look of inner turmoil. Like he was pondering what to say.

He cleared his throat " H-Harry I think I have something I need to tell you."

I looked back up at him, my face now sharing the same look of question.

"I know what you're feeling. You're scared and in despair. You can't bare to be in your own house because everything you look at reminds you of her. Everything you do reminds you of her. You can't escape what you're feeling because even when you sleep it haunts your dreams."

I looked down at my shoes and squeezed my eyes tight, not wanting to have a sobbing fit in public.

"You find yourself up til all hours of the night. Exploring the darkest corners of your mind, wondering why she left you. Wondering If this is the end."

I couldn't take it anymore as the tears began to roll down my cheeks, staining them. I raised my hand up "stop, please. I can't do this."

"Harry, look at me." He demanded

I looked up hesitantly, ashamed of my tear soaked face, to meet his strong eyes.

"This is not the end."

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Hey I hope you liked It! Sorry I didn't update for a while, it was taking me forever to figure out how to write this chapter. Anyway, keep reading, voting, and commenting. Love ya!