It's Always 2 VS 1: A LeLi Fanfiction

Chapter 8

I kept walking until I got to the highway. A black car pulled up next to me. Lisa. She rolled down the window and motioned for me to get in.

"No. I'm fine walking." I sniffed, trying not to show her I was crying.

"Just get in the car Ryder."

"No, you're right, karma's a bitch. I don't deserve only one karma."

"Huh?"

"Never mind. Just leave me be."

"Get in the damn car Ryder, okay?" I rolled my eyes and got in the passenger seat, resting my elbow on a part sticking out from the door. She didn't say anything the way there, so I didn't either. Until we were almost to my our street. "Should we pick up Noel." I held my breath and shook my head, rubbing my eyes while trying not to let out any noise. "Awe come on. I miss him."

"So do I." I whispered under my breath, to where only I could hear. I shook my head again.

"Okay? I thought you liked to see him."

"I do. I love seeing him. I just-" I cut myself off, not wanting her to know.

"Are you crying?"

"No." My voice just had to crack, now didn't it. She pulled the car over and grabbed my face, making me look at her.

"Ryder, what aren't you telling me?"

"Nothing, I'm just not feeling well."

"But you're crying."

"No I'm not."

"Yes, you clearly are. What's wrong?"

"Nothings wrong."

"I'm gonna pick up Noel, he always makes you feel better."

"No, please don't. He's fine I'm sure. I'm fine. Let's just go to my house and get this over with."

"Umm, okay?" She started driving again as I let out a silent sigh of relief. We pulled up to my house and walked in. I closed Noels door when we walked past it, not wanting to have it changed. She closed my room door once we got in and set her book bag on my bed, pulling out the packet. I walked to my closet, grabbing a black long sleeved shirt because it had gotten cold. I took off my white shirt and tossed it on the ground. I caught Lisa staring at me, a worried look on her face. "Have you been eating? You look so malnourished."

"Huh? Oh, yeah." I nodded, trying to get off the subject.

"Okay then. Should we grab a snack?"

"I'm not really hungry, but you can have one if you want."

"What'd you have for breakfast?"

"A little bit of a biscuit."

"How about for dinner last night?"

"I didn't eat, I was asleep."

"How about for breakfast and lunch?"

"I was still asleep."

"When was the last time you ate?"

"This morning."

"Before that, idiot."

"Last Monday or Tuesday." I shrugged and threw my shirt on.

"Ryder! You aren't supposed to go that long without food!"

"I'm not hungry and you're skinnier than me. I'm fine."

"No you aren't fine. There's something you aren't telling me."

"No there isn't, Lisa. I'm fine and you shouldn't worry. Now let's just get this packet over with." I sigh as she lets out a long breath, just looking at me.

"Okay Ryder. If that's what you want." I sit at my desk with her, working through math problems and such. I'm just gonna say it took forever. We were there working until 6pm. And we still weren't completely finished. "It's 6:08, shouldn't you be picking up Noel?"

"Umm." Just the mention of his name made me sick to my stomach. "Yeah, I-I guess. I'll see you tomorrow then."

"Wait, can I go with? I want to see him."

"Me too." I sighed.

"What? Did you say me too?"

"N-no. I just-" I cut myself off again. I couldn't continue without crying, and I certainly wasn't going to cry again.

"You just what?"

"Nothing."

"Ryder, please. There's something wrong with you." Her voice was soft and her hand was placed on my forearm, running up and down, her fingertips sending chills up my arms. I have to tell her. She deserves to know.

"Noel." My voice cracked as I spoke, my eyes tearing up.

"What about him."

"He's....he's gone." I struggled to say it. As much as I needed to, it hurt. It hurt bad.

"Ryder, what do you mean he's gone?" Her eyes were wide and her small hands were gripping my arm tight, her nails digging into my skin.

"He's gone Lisa. I got him killed. He's dead because of me." I felt tears drip down my face.

"What happened Ryder? When?" She now had tears in her eyes, making the hazel shine and stand out.

"The day we pranked you, I came home and the door was open. You were right Lisa, I am a horrible brother. I got him killed." I was full on crying now, even when she pulled me close, her head against my chest.

"I'm sorry Ryder. I know it hurts. I know. I'm so sorry. It's not your fault Ryder. You have to realise that. Bad things happen to good people."

"But I'm not a good person Lisa. I got my whole family killed. If i just stayed quiet, my dad would be alive, and if he was alive, my mom would be alive, and if she was alive, Noel would be alive. We'd be like we used to. We'd be friends again. It'd all be okay." She grabbed my face between her soft hands and looked me in the eye.

"Ryder. You have to get this through your head. Nobody is blaming you but yourself. No one thinks you did anything wrong."

"Because no one knows Lisa! They think my parents are still here, they think my brothers still here, and they think I'm still here! But I'm not! I'm broken! I'm lost! I-" she cut me off by pulling my face down and gently laying her lips on mine. I felt her smile against me like she's been waiting for this. I slowly creep my arms around her lower back, her stomach pressing against mine. Right then and there I forgot about everything but her. Nothing else existed up to that point. And that didn't matter to me. At that minute, I could've been dead for all I cared, all long as this lasted, I'm more than alive. She finally pulled back, the sound of her lips leaving mine, satisfying, but also disappointing. "I-I uhh." I stuttered at a loss for words as she stood still, her eyes closed and the corners of her lips curved up into an embarrassed smile.

"...."