The past, it's heataches, and happiness

New day.

   It was Sunday morning the day after Tony and Jayy got in an argument over how he treats me. I personally don't like it either, so why do i stay? is it love? denial? or a fear of loneliness? I really don't know honestly.  I dreamed about Jayy last night, oddly enough because I hardly know him, I dreamed that we were holding hands and walking down a nice path with the sunset perfectly, it was rather romantic...I didn't want to wake up. I soon got  a text while laying in my comfortable bed and it was from Tony so I read it and it said "hey, can't make it tonight...call me at nine okay" I knew of course to call him at nine exactly or I would be scolded and such. I texted back "Okay baby <3", then I finally arose from my bed I was perfectly comfortable in and stumbled out of my bed and went over to my closet to pick out my clothes for the day. I skimmed through every item and picked out a black tank top, black skinnies, and a black jacket...how simple.

I soon got dressed, avoiding to take a shower today so that way I could take one later tonight since I don't wanna run late tomorrow since Tony is a chatter box on the phone. I went to the mirror in the bathroom to do my oral hygiene habit and fix my hair in the process of getting ready for my day. When I got done doing those things I headed downstairs, it was empty so I went into the kitchen and seen a note, my parents and my brother left for the day, great. I had the house to myself and Tony was busy. I thought it would be a good opportunity to get to know Jayy without Tony knowing of course. I soon found myself slipping on some shoes and looking around before going next door and knocking lightly on the door.

I was soon greeted by him, he looked so handsome and everything listed under beautiful. Jayy said "Hey, how are you doing kid?" He asked with a small smile. I smiled back and said "I'm okay I suppose..really bored I'm home alone for the day, I was wondering if you wanted to hangout...Tony isn't around, he is to busy" I had sighed after that hoping to not be rejected. Jayy then said to me "sure, I would love to, um wanna come in?" I of course nodded and followed him in and shut the door behind me, it was only me and him at the place right now. I took a seat on the couch ad Jayy sat across from me in his recliner smoking a cigarette.

I then said "sorry about yesterday with Tony, he has anger problems and other issues"  I still couldn't fathom that I lost my virginity to Tony and we were back together.  The thoughts of that stuff made me sad inside and disgusting but I tried to push them away since I was around this beautiful man. Jayy had finally replied to what I said after he put out his cigarette "oh it's totally fine..he should understand that its not right to talk to you like that" he said to me. I nodded and said "yeah I know, but I've been around it so much I guess I'm okay with it I suppose" I looked down at my lap in disgust about Tony. Jayy shook his head and said "well your one though kid for putting up with it, I respect you" he said giving me a small smile.

His smiled mad me wanna melt inside, it was co charming and handsome, ugh he was so gorgeous, I had to admit that to myself by now. Jayy then offered me something to drink but I told him I was fine and we started to chat for an hour about what it was like to live here, since he was new to the neighborhood and such. We were getting along very well, and yes I started to like him a little...I just felt like happy around him. I knew Jayy kind of liked me back though we barely knew each other, I could just feel it honestly. We still kept talking for another hour about him on the road, it was fascinating, he showed me a few of his songs he sang with Dahvie and showed me some merch.

He ended up giving me a free CD along with a few shirts, you had no idea how happy I was, anything free was always good..half the time. We were hitting off quiet nicely, we actually did flirt a little that day, we were friends from the starts as it seemed but we exchanged numbers so we could text each other and stuff, of course I would put his number of one of my friends that I rarely text. We were sitting int he kitchen by now and he made pizza and we were flirting again and again, it seemed like we had an immediate connection. He asked me "do you want a beer?" I nodded and he handed me one, I began to drink it and making my way to a second one and then a third after we ate our pizza together, had I not realize it was eleven at night, Jayy and me were drunk, no that's what I call a friend.