Okay sooooo if you didn't notice, I deleted the last two chapters I posted cause I decided that there should be more to the story than just Hope and Dustin's relationship. I hope you like this!!! oh and sorry it's so short
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Chapter 5
"Jaymie," I said into my phone as I drove towards her house from Dustin's.
"Yup, what's up?" she answered.
"I'm coming over right now, get ready; we're going to a party."
"Um, okay, I'll see you then,' Jaymie said before hanging up.
What the hell? Dustin cannot care about me. I could not care about him. Caring inevitable led to being let down or heart break. I screamed. What is happening to me? Ever since Jason I promised myself that I wouldn’t let anyone get this close to me. I thought I made it clear that things with him weren’t serious by sneaking out every time I was over. We never talked, we just had sex and then I left. He was a great distraction from how angry my mom made me and only that. But I have to admit; somewhere from the first time we hooked up and now, I developed some unwanted feelings for him. I knew the risks I was taking by even hooking up with him again, but he was just so damn good at sex.
Shit. I really did feel something for him. He made me feel good whenever I was sad. He never asked me what was wrong because he knew I didn’t want to talk about it. He was different from Jason. Things were easier with Dustin. But I’m not going to open myself up to him. I can’t and I don’t want to. Wait, no, I do want to open up to him; I’m just afraid of what opening up will do. I’m not going to let him see who I really am. I’m going to stay the quickie hookup that we are so that he won’t be disappointed with the real me. I don’t care if he’s seen me in one of my most vulnerable states, knowing who I really am is different from seeing me cry. I definitely needed to get him out of my head.
I pulled into Jaymie’s driveway and rang the doorbell.
“Hey Hope,” Jaymie said, letting me in.
“Hey, can I borrow something to wear?”
“Um… sure…” she answered, leading me up to her room.
“Thanks,” I said, going into her closet to find the sluttiest thing she owned. I needed to ensure that I would have a large choice of guys tonight because Dustin needed to be pushed as far out of my mind as possible.
“What happened? I thought you were hooking with Dustin?” she asked, putting on her makeup.
“Ummmm… I don’t really want to talk about it.” I pulled on a short wrap skirt and a cropped tank top with a lace back on before joining her in front of the mirror to put make up on.
“Seriously Hope, I thought you were really into Dustin. Why are we going out?”
“That’s the problem Jaymie. I’m really into him and it scares me. I haven’t felt this way since Jason; and we all know how that turned out. I’m not going to let what happened with Jason happen again.” I ran my hand though my hair and turned to Jaymie. “I just need some drunk sex to completely obliterate me so that I can stop thinking about Dustin.”
“Come one Hope, that’s not fair. Jason is one person, Dustin is different. You care about him and he cares about you. He would never hurt you the way Jason did. Why can’t you just open your heart to him? Dustin could really make everything better.”
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Alone (On Hold!)
Teen Fiction"I think I was about thirteen years old when I decided I wanted to die." Hope has been able to do whatever she pleased, but that didn't mean she didn't get in trouble. After constantly being put down by her parents for not being good enough, Hope d...
