Finding Myself. ~Sequel to Loosing Myself.~

~Chapter 1~

~Ashlees P.O.V~

He opens the letter, complete shock wrote over his face. He's confused wondering if I broke up with him. 

The letter I wrote to im in his hands, tears all over the scripted writing.

Why is he so upset? I didn't break up with him. 

'Baby-' I try through the glass, my eyes widening in shock, seeing Justin slam his fists down on the bedside table.

A tear falls from my eyes, when did this glass get here? Why can't I touch him? I put my hand on the glass, watching tears fall from my boyfriends eyes. I need to be with him, the distance is pulling us apart. 

Why did I leave? Why am I hurting him so much?  A shaky breath escapes my mouth as he rummages through the drawers, taking out his famous pack of cigarettes. He takes one, lighting it with his lighter and bringing it up to his lips, practically eschaling every ounce of stress he has.

A smirk appears on his face, creating my eye brows to furrow. What could he possibly be happy about? He goes into the drawer taking out... weed? He wraps it in a roll up, holding it in his hands. Its what he wants more than anything. I can tell. 

I slam on the glass, punching it as hard as I can. He still won't look at me, he still can't hear me.

'Justin!' I scream, although its completely worthless. 'Justin!' 

I feel a tug on the back of my shirt and something pulling me down, making him completley out of my sight..

My body shoots up immeditley, the same nightmare repeating in my head.

What's gotten into me? Why am I so nervous for Justin, when I left him two months ago and we're perfectly fine?

I pick up my cellphone, dialling the familiar number, to my surprise he answers the first ring.

'Baby?' My boyfriend, Justin asks through the dialler, making my heart errupt into a million butterflies at the pet name.

'Thank God, you're okay.' I breathe, saying it more to myself.

'Of course I'm okay.. Are you having nightmares again baby?' 

I secure the blanket around me, leaning back into my lonely bed.

'Yeah I am.' I say, a slight shiver sending down my back.

'Same one?'

I cant help a tear slipping from my eyes, I hate that I'm not with him.  

I hate the seperation and I hate knowing he hates it too. I hate being in his arms, gaurding me if I ever had a nightmare. I hate the distance, how far we are from eachother. I miss the feeling of his lips on mine, his arms around my waist or even when we made love. I miss everything about him, starting from his gorgeous brown eyes. 

'I'm coming up this weekend, I don't like you living on your own.'

I can just imagine his teeth gritted, like he always did when hes upset about me, or the decisions I make.

'Justin I'm fine, although I wouldn't mind you coming up, Ryan comes up and checks the rooms everynight.' 

'Whos Ryan?' 

'The guy on my hall.' I roll my eyes slightly, same old Justin.

'He hasnt been in your room has he?'

I laugh at how much he sounds like my father, continuing our conversastion throughout the night until we agree to fall asleep.

~Justins P.O.V Friday afternoon~

I wait outside her school, My hands perked on my knees, clasped together.

Why am I so nervous? Its not like we arent together. We are. Arent we?

We love eachother, thats all I know right now. If we didn't we wouldnt be going through all this together. I do love her, I love her more than anything.

But her constant nightmares about me smoking are starting to scare the hell out of me. I mean I am, but I don't want her to know. I'm not doing weed though, I promised her I wouldn't and I really do intend to keep that promise.

Her living in New York is just so.. different to what I'm used to. Us being the 'it' couple in high school was what I liked, having her against her locker is what I like. Picking her up on the way... Our Music Room. 

I just miss seeing her everyday I guess. I'm proud of her, for doing what she loves. I'm still in Canada just earning myself a Football Scholarship, its what I've always wanted to achieve. I just wish I had my girl at all my games. 

My eyes snap up, seeing Ashlee walking down the steps. My heart flutters, as cheesy as it sounds, seeing her in a little dress. I've missed her so much. 

'Justin?!' She gasps, her eyes widening as she sets eyes on my own.

A smile spreads across her face, making one spread on my own. She starts running towards me and I instantly catch her in my arms, twirling her around lightly

 her hair smells the same, like strawberrys. I can't help my smile getting wider knowing I'm finally with her. 

'Are you going to show me to your apartment?' I tease her, wrapping my arms around her waist when I set her down.

'On one condition..' she smiles, her beautiful hazel eyes meeting my own. 'Kiss me.'

I don't need to be told twice as I attach my lips against hers.

Finally..

~WRITERS NOTE~

Yay! Its begun! Now i'm going to start posting once a week.. this is just a short one to get it started! I have plans for this book and I can't wait to start writing! I love you all!