Finding Myself. ~Sequel to Loosing Myself.~

My thoughts.

The worst part about being hurt about a boy is when you ignored the warnings. You ignored everyones warning signs, they told you about him but you chose to ignore it because you thought maybe this time, this time it could be different.

That's the thing I regret the most. Ignoring people when they told me to run. He was toxic, he was dangereous and I knew that. I knew that but I wanted the ounce of affection he was giving me.

I knew he was dangereous, I knew he had his way around girls and knew what to say. Hell, even he knew. He knew that girls fall for him. He warned me himself that he isn't a feelings person but I was so Naieve I thought he would turn out different, fall for me and be happy.

Even when its over, it just comes back. I knew this would happen, everyone knew it would. Being hurt before I was cautious, but not cautious enough to stay away. Why would I be so attracted to someone? Thought someone could be so good? It was his actions, his sweet words, his beautiful personality and his innocent apperance that drove me to him. I thought 'he couldn't be bad for me.' but he was. He was so bad for me.

It was a mistake. He knew I wasn't like the other girls he was with, who got stoned and was up for anybody. I was how he liked to call me, 'Innocent'. He liked that about me. 

Its my fault really. I ignored the warning signs. I knew he was trouble, so it's my fault really. I was too caught up in my own day dreams about him I ignored the reality of the situation. I knew he's been hurt before, and loves the attention girls give him now because of how many times he's had his heart broken himself.

Is that a good enough reason? To hurt someone else? 

Nothing is as good as it seems.

Or maybe its just me.