"beautiful, violent, vulgar."
"thats what his love was like?"
"in the short, sweet way? yes." i shakily brought the cigarette up to my lips and took a drag.
i refused to shut my eyes. even a blink and flashbacks of him rushed through me. he was like...permanently input in my mind.
his love was beautiful in a way that made me feel unique. it made me feel like i was the only thing that mattered. his love was beautiful. he was beautiful.
but was he beautiful because of his love? or was his love beautiful because of him?
his love was beautiful but everything else about him was torturous. he was violent in the worst ways. he was vulgar.
violence and vulgarity are a toxic combination. but maybe it was twice as toxic because it was coming from michael.
"you okay?" calum asked.
"no."
calum sighed and got up, telling me he had to get back to his girlfriend. his girlfriend was my best friend. they were so pathetically in love it made me sick. not sick in a good way. sick in the way where id rather have my skin stripped off me, strand by strand.
but i was just bitter. bitter that michael didnt love me like that.
his love ruined me. his love was beautiful. but he was violent and vulgar. it made sense now.
either way...i still wanted him.
