Death Wish

Part 18

The Rankings of all Dauntless initiates:

1:Tom(Dauntless Born)

2:Christopher(Dauntless born)

3:Deitrich

4:Ferris

5:Frankfurt

6:Saratoga(Female Dauntless born)

7:Morsov

8:Ryan

9:Alexander(Dauntless Born)

10:Matius

11:Verlayne (The girl Matius likes)

12:Anderson(Dauntless born)

13:Samuel

14: Rency

15:Emer

16:Elvis(Dauntless born)

17: Lily

18:Tina(Dauntless born)

19:Raymond

20:Casey( Female Dauntless born)

21:Freya

______Red__Line_______

22:Adam

23:Myra(Dauntless born)

24:Larry(Dauntless born)

25:Lucille

I couldn't believe that I was in fourth place. A swell of pride pooled in my chest. Even though I could have been considered for third, Deitrich's win against Morsov and increasing strength in training was incredibly impressive.

But what really made me happy was that none of my friends were below the red line. We were all safe and even though there was still the second phase of training to get through, none of us were especially worried about it.

Unfortunately, we weren't able to properly celebrate since we had our first day of fear landscapes the day after the third fight. No one knew exactly what to expect and it kept us on edge.

All we knew for sure was that each session would be done individually by either Four or Eric.

Speaking of Eric, he actually came by after, the last round of fights, while I was in the infirmary to compliment me.

Well, I guess it was sort of a compliment. He'd actually just said, "You uhm, fought good." (Insert Mulan meme here) before briskly walking out.

Regardless of the awkward delivery, I still took the affirmation.

Presently, I was waiting with Matius, a Dauntless girl named Verlayne, and Morsov to be called in for the fear sims. Verlayne was the girl Matius had been talking to at the party and she seemed likable. She spoke in the same passive aggressive tone that all Dauntless born seemed to but it thankfully played off my natural Candor sarcasm well.

Ryan, Remcy, and Morsov had already been called but there must have been a back door or something because weaq hadn't seen them since they left. I bit anxiously at my nails as we waited.

After maybe twenty more minutes of waiting, Four called me into the room. I complied and followed him into a bare white room with a reclined chair, the kind you see in a dentist's office, in the center of the room.

I hated going to the dentist

"Take a seat" Four ordered stoically as he prepared  a syringe that I looked at warily. "I'm gonna inject you with a serum that stimulates the part of your brain that processes fear."

I nodded.

"It induces hallucination and then transmitters in the serum allow me to see the images in your mind," Four added as he connected small electronic cords to my temples.

"You can see inside my mind?" I asked with furrowed briws.

"Mm-hmm" Four replied as he took the syringe and injected whatever was in it into my neck. I winced at the sharp pain but said nothing. "Okay, you're going to be facing your worst fears, Ferris. Most people have ten to fifteen really bad ones. You have to calm yourself. Slow your heart rate and your breathing and deal with what's in front of you. Be brave" He told me as I slipped into darkness.

My eyes reopened for me to find myself in a dimly lit room with cracked cement walls. I squinted in the low light only to see small little shapes crawling from the cracks. Said figures had six legs and nasty little pinching mouths.

Ants.

I immediately started screaming as they began to race up my legs. I crumbled to the ground as they got into my eyes and mouth. (Cue Nicholas Cage meme here) My eyes clamped shut as I covered my head with my hands.

It's not real! It's not real!

As soon as I thought that, the little legs racing up and down my skin disappeared. I shakily lowered my arms and opened my eyes to find myself on an operating table. My hands were strapped down as a bright land over head nearly blinded me. Three menacing looking men with cold eyes stood around me wearing medical masks and holding sharp, silver tools. I struggled in the restraints, my arms straining against the leathers as the doctors lowered the metal tools to my face ready to operate. Then I remembered, it wasn't real......

The restraints disappeared and I took the opportunity to swipe the tools from one of the doctors and drive it into his neck. The momentum going forward sent me tumbling off the table and the doctor faded out of sight.

I looked up to see Eric standing right above me. My brows furrowed as I stood back up but just as I regained my footing he pressed me up against a nearby wall and started kissing down my neck. My knees suddenly felt weak.

"Eric, stop!" I said weakly as he pinned both my hands above my head with one hand while the other trailed around the waistband of my pants. I knew it was wrong but I didn't fight against him.

His hand was now travelling up my stomach and a flair of panic hit my senses.

I shut my eyes. It isn't real! It isn't real!

Eric's hands and mouth disappeared.

I opened my eyes and found myself back in the chair with the processors still connected to my head. I gasped loudly, as if resurfacing from water. I attempted to leap from the chair when Four stopped me.

"Stop, it's alright, you're fine, ok?" Four assured as I struggled against his grip

I came to my senses and leaned back in the seat. I had a hand on my chest that could feel the rapid beating in my chest.

Four waited a moment.

"How long do you think you were in there?" Four asked looking down.

I shrugged. " Uh... maybe 20 minutes?" I offered. That seemed to be the median amount of time between sessions.

"You were in there for only 4 minutes, that's three times faster than average. How did you get rid of the ants and the doctors?" He asked me inquisitively.

I shook my head. "Uh I don't know I..." I tried to say.

"What did you score on your aptitude test?" Four asked curtly.

"Dauntless," I said without any hesitation even though I scored Divergent. He looked back at me with the same amount of stoicism but I could see the doubt in his eyes.

"I want you to meet me here tonight at 8, I want to talk to you more about this" Four told me and I tilted my head in confusion.

"Sir, I don't understand, did I do something wrong?" I asked.

Four shook. "I just want to make sure of something," He answered as I lifted myself out of the chair.

I had a hand on the door when Four's voice hit the air again.

"Who was that in your last fear?" He asked knowingly and I knew instantly that it was a rhetorical question.

I didn't say anything but an unmistakable pink tinge appeared one my cheeks as I left.