Nothing | danny o'donoghue (en)

8.

[ Glen ]

"Emma, Emma, I know that. It wasn't his intention nor was mine, but... things happen." I took a small break from speaking, inhaling the pure fresh air. The local park near Mark's is the perfect place to hideaway, to escape from the real word with all those problems we all hate. The shaky breading that I was hearing from the other side of the line wasn't buying it. She was still in shock, and I understand that. I messed up, Danny messed up, we all messed up. But at the end of the day, I have my right to want my privacy back, to breath freely for once.

"But Glen, I know it was awful what we all did to you, but it was unintentional. We were drunk, that's true. And it is no excuse for what we have done. Alcohol is no excuse, but you gotta understand us right now... Well, me, because the other two were almost killing each other." What happened? Right now I'm really worried, and all I wanted was some fresh air. "The point is, you leaving really struck Dan and Mark, specially Mark. It really hit him." With those words I understood what was happening in that little head - she blamed herself, the same thing happened with the other two. And that was where they were wrong. It wasn't their fault, it was everybody's fault! Sometimes I can really appreciate and see the job that I have in my friends group. We all get along very well, yet I believe I'm like their glue. If I'm not there in critical situations, just like this one, everything falls apart. "He even cried. And Mark never cries!!" Oh, crap. I really am their glue.

"It's worse than I thought, Em. Way worse..." Mark doesn't cry, he has balls to do everything and almost anything, he always mans up! He's the crazy bastard who challenges us to do something we won't do, but he will. "What has happened, happened, and it's none of his fault. We have all done bad stuff, I'm aware of it, are you?" Silence. My breathing was rushing at this point, I'm nervous and feeling partially guilty, that's the odd thing. You could say I'm pretty calm, most of the times. This time is not 'most of the times'. I guess I'm not holding them together as I should and did before. Maybe we were all messed up, and glued us all together with each other. Maybe I'm not gluing them enough. Maybe I--

"I-I am, G-Glen." Emma stuttered those three little words. I need to go home, I need to fix this, to fix them all. We need to be glued back together, like therapy. After all, we're all in the same page, keeping each other alive and well.

"Don't tell anyone, but I'm going home." Without transmitting any emotion through the line, I stated firmly. She lets out a long relieved breathe.

"Thank you. Thank you so much Glen. But why?" The small girl asked, insecure about my previous statement. I was being serious, Emma know that, she's just way too worried.

"I'm like your glue. It's crazy, I know, but follow me here. Without me, Mark, Dan, you and I are just some underdogs, trying to keep everything in place and our lives sorted. However, when I'm around, I glue us all together. Together we're fine-ish, we sort everything out quickly and we have a great time, an amazing time actually. I'm the missing piece there, because without me, you're all ruined." I dramatically say to the other side. When the girl starts sniffing, I know it's my time to go and make things better.

We're all broken, and it's mainly my fault. Only I, the one who caused this, can fix it.

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(English is not my mother tongue so, if anything is grammatically incorrect, sorry. I couldn't re-read this chapter yet. Will do it soon)

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And I failed you guys! I didn't post during xmas, and my tests started again, everything was pilling up, sorry :(

But hey! I'm here now! And I'm already writing the next chapter :)  Get ready for some revelations...

Happy readings!
K xx