Fuck Boy

F O U R T E E N - Date?

//Dan's POV - The previous day\\

"I'm sorry. I love you." I whimper. Tears well up in Phil's eyes. I made him cry. I did this. This is my fault. I made a promise to myself never to hurt Phil like Michael did, but I think I've hurt him worse without even touching him.
"Please leave." Phil whispers, biting his lip. I nod and walk out the door, looking back at him one last time. He shuts the door, making the reality set in. I've lost him. I hear Phil cry out from the other side of the door, breaking my heart. I almost reach out to open the door, but I force myself to turn away, I will only hurt him more.

I slam my bedroom door shut and punch the wall.
"What the fuck is wrong with me?" I scream, more than just angry at myself. I sink down on to my bed and hang my head, sobbing into my hands. Phil is the first person I truly loved and I couldn't see it because of my stupid addiction to sex. I know my parents are home, they just don't give a shit about me anymore. They gave up on me when I first started sleeping around. It's completely my fault. Everything's my fault.

I put my phone down after sending several texts to Phil. I want him back. I know I won't get him back but I need to him know I'm sorry. After a couple of seconds my phone buzzes. Phil? No. It's Elliot.

You're a fucking asshole Dan! How could you do that to him? You're a lying scum and I fucking hate you.

I hardly react. It's all true.

I know. You have every right to hate me but please can you text Phil and see if he's okay?

I press send and wait for an answer.

Fine, but I'm not doing it for you, I'm going to explain myself and apologise. What's his number?

I send Elliot Phil's number and turn off my phone. It buzzes as Elliot replies, but I can't be bother to look at it. I shut my eyes and slowly fall into a dreamless sleep.

Phil's POV - two days later

I finally get out of bed and haul myself to the bathroom. I need to get my mind off Dan, if I don't I'll just hurt more. I look in the mirror and crack a smile at how stupid I look. My hair's sticking up in all directions, I'm already starting to get beard, I have bags under my eyes and I look slightly insane. I turn on the shower and wait for it to heat up. I take off my clothes and step into the shower, the warm water soothing my body. I let out a small sigh of relief and rub my face. I hope the offer to meet up with Elliot is still open...
-
Hey Elliot, are you free today? I actually don't feel like crap for once so I'd like to talk to you.

I put my phone down and find some clothes. Even if he's not free or doesn't want to talk I still want to go out. I've been stuck in this apartment for too long. I smile slightly as my phone buzzes.

Yeah, I'm free, I'd love to talk. Where do you want to meet?

"Oh thank god." I mutter, before typing a response.

The cafe down the road from my apartment?

The reply is almost instant.

Cool :) see you there in ten?

Sure :)

I smile and finish getting ready. God I hope today is going to be a good day...

"Hey." I smile as I see Elliot.
"Hi." Elliot says, obviously weary of me.
"Please don't be weary of me, I'm not going to do anything to you." I sigh. "Who I was when we first met, that wasn't me."
"Sorry." Elliot shakes his head. "I wanna say I'm sorry again for-"
"Elliot please, I don't want to think about that." I sigh.
"I won't bring it up again." Elliot nods.
"Thank you." I smile slightly. "We should go in, its cold." I chuckle.
"Yeah." Elliot smiles. I open the door for him and follow him inside.
"What do you want to get?" I ask.
"Just a coffee. I'll pay for it, it's okay." He says.
"Nope, I'm paying, it's me apologising for shouting at you." I shake my head.
"Phil you don't need to apologise for anything. You had a right to shout at me." Elliot reasons.
"Elliot, I'm paying." I say.
"Fine." He rolls his eyes, failing at hiding his smile.

Elliot leans back and laughs and something I said.
"You're so nice." Elliot mutters, resting his elbows on the table. "After all you've been through, you're one of the nicest people I know."
"Thank you." I smile.
"Why would anyone cheat on you? You're lovely and gorgeous." Elliot mutters. I blush and smile.
"It's not the worst I've had done to me." I sigh.
"What happened?" Elliot asks, sitting back.
"If I tell you, you have to promise that you won't give me sympathy." I say.
"Sure." He nods
"My ex boyfriend physically and emotionally abused me for two years. He almost killed me before he was sent to prison." I say.
"Jesus..." Elliot mutters. "How long ago was this?"
"Just over four months ago now. I'm okay now." I smile reassuringly. Elliot nods and holds his hand out on the table for me to take. I shyly place my hand in his. Elliot smiles slightly and squeezes my hand reassuringly.
"I can't promise you that he won't hurt you again but if I see anyone hurting you again I will personally kill them." Elliot says in a low, threatening voice.
"Thank you." I chuckle. Elliot smiles and stroke his thumb over my hand.

"I had a really nice time." I smile, leaning on my door frame.
"I did as well." Elliot smiles. I reach forwards and hold his hand. Elliot blushes softly and looks down to my lips. I nervously lean in. Elliot closes the gasp and kisses me. Dan is finally pushed out of me mind. Elliot pulls away and smiles. "Text me." Elliot says.
"I will." I smile.
"See you later Phil." Elliot smiles before walking away. I go into my flat and lock the door. I smile and sit on my sofa. I don't think I'm ready for another relationship yet, but it's nice to have someone you can romantically cuddle with without the commitment. Do I even want commitment? I mean, Michael hit me when I was committed to him, and Dan cheated on me... Will Elliot be different? I trust him, but I trusted Dan and Michael as well. Well now I've made myself feel like shit. I rub my eyes and groan. I get my phone and text Elliot. He can cheer me up.

I hope...