Just Last Summer *working*

June 20, 2009

I looked at another picture in the album. My heart throbbing by this picture.

June 20, 2009

There was a picture of a cake ad my father's name.

Today, I brought a cake to Daddy. He actually, for the first time in years smiled. I hadn't told him about Justin because I didn't really want him knowing how I was doing.

~

"Today is about your dad. The only relative you have left." I told myself quietly before heading into the hospital.

I walked up to the front desk. "I'm hear to see Donald Simon." I told the front desk lady.

"Room 347," She said. "I'll tell the nurse you are hear."

I quietly walked to the elevator and pressed the 'up' button. I waited quietly and then headed in when the doors opened. I pressed the four and breathed slowly.

What if he looks worse?

What if he's still mad at me?

The doors opened and I walked down the long hallway.

343

344

345

At last, 347. I knocked quietly. "Come in." Coughed my sickly father.

I opened the door with a smile. "Happy birthday daddy!" I cheered as a smile lit up on his face like a Christmas Tree.

"Sydney!" He called. "I'm surprised you showed up."

"I've missed you." I said putting the cake on the table next to him and giving him a hug.

"Me too."

He didn't look that bad, still sick but not as how I thought he'd be. He was actually able to sit up.

"This is probably, my last birthday," He sighed. "My days are limited."

"Don't say that!" I cried. "You need to be positive. Expect the unexpected."

"But Sydney, we must be realistic."

A tear escaped from my eye. "I-I love you dad." I croaked.

"I love you too," He smiled kissing my head. "Thank you for this cake, the nurses gave me a dry cupcake."

I looked at the ground.

"How's college?" Asked Dad.

"It's been pretty good. UCLA isn't too hard." I answered.

"You know, I still wished you went to Harvard." He sighed.

"UCLA is a good school, and being at Harvard would be too hard to visit you." I said biting my lip.

"But my days are numbered, docs say I only have a month left," He sighed. "That's what cancer does."

Now I had a major headache and was waiting to go into bed and cry.

~

I headed out of the hospital doors and got into my car to go home.

'My life is so jacked' was the only thing I thought as I drove home.

~

I looked picture and cried for what I would've done at the hospital that day.

"Why my life God?" I cried taking the bloody razor and making my third gash on my wrist.