The Difficult Task of Raising a Weapon

Shadow: Night Terrors

"Maria!" I scream, tearing myself from sleep, gasping as my brain tries to process what's going on. Still in a dream state, I look around frantically for my friend, I try to warn her of the danger, but I know it's too late. A sob hiccups out of my throat, and I realize that I can't move my body. Wha--What's wrong with me?! I start panicking before I remember that sleep paralysis can occur when someone wakes up from REM sleep.

Dread fills me as I comprehend the danger I just put myself in. Oh no. Did someone hear me? If someone heard me, I'm helpless to defend myself right now. My breaths catch as I silence my frantic gasps, my ears swiveling every direction in search of approaching people. I practically hold my breath for the first ten minutes, and I allow myself quiet breathing for the ten after, but by the time half an hour passes, I have calmed. I refuse to move, despite again being able to, for the next half hour after it, but then start to feel safe.

I had a horrible nightmare, and I woke up screaming. It would have been so easy for someone to hear me, but thankfully, no one seemed to. If someone had, my hiding place would have been exposed, and I would have had to run. But I was unable to move. If a patrol of G.U.N. had found me, I could--would--have been captured. I would have been completely helpless against them. I can't risk that happening again. Pulling my knees into my chest, I huddle with my makeshift blanket around me and try to completely shake off the tendrils of fear that still cling to me. It's only a few hours past since I first went to sleep, based on the sky. Frowning into the night, I think back on my sleep destroying dream.

That night terror, it was just like being back on the ARK... Running towards the launch bay, being locked into the escape pod, watching Maria get shot... Only, it was so much worse than I even remember... I knew what was going to happen, but I couldn't stop it! What a horrible, horrible dream... Still huddling with my tablecloth, I make a decision.

I'm NOT going back to sleep; it's too dangerous for me. I have to stay awake until morning, and then I have to find another place to hide. I bet there's some place I can find that's covered on a rooftop... Then I can observe humans going about their daily lives and learn about the people here on Earth. If I at least know how these humans act, maybe I can find a way to fulfill Maria's wish. The thought of Maria's wish brings back even more pain than the nightmare, but I try to numb myself emotionally so that I don't cry.

I'll do everything I can for her, but I won't do myself or her any good by getting myself captured because I'm crying too loudly. Now that would be a stupid way to get captured... My eyes droop, but I force them open and shake my head around, spreading my quills and getting my blood flowing. The action helps wake me up, and I start as my stomach growls ferociously. Standing quietly, I open the enormous metal bin and follow my nose until I find a few browning pieces of fruit. I also find a metal can that says "Extra Large Pitted Olives*." I peer down at the red label on the can, wondering what an "olive" is. Deciding it can't hurt to find out, I remove my right glove, taking off my titanium digit, and carefully start cutting into the metal with my talon. The can resists, but I determinedly claw a jagged square in the top and squint at the contents. They smell...strange. Shrugging, I fish out a slimy and black rubbery oval and sniff it carefully. Then I take a small bite of it.

"*Oolp!*" I gag at the taste, but manage to swallow it. I make myself eat several more of them, and find that the strange sensation of taste becomes slightly appealing once I'm used to them. What a strange food... Humans sure have found many different ways to consume edible things... I then start to pick at the fruit, finding an apple that has half a good side to it. The only fruit I've ever had has been dried**, so I apprehensively take a bite of it. It's harder than I thought, but surprisingly delicious. I quickly finish the good parts, and start rummaging for another one. Scoring one with ⅔ goodness left, I crunch and munch away at it, finding my stomach enjoys the treat as much as I do. I then spend over ten minutes trying to get a piece of skin from it out from between my fangs. Blasted thing! Get out of my teeth already! I eventually succeed, and then continue on my search for food.

There's got to be more food in here... I find stale bread, rotten fruit, some things I don't think ever were food, and decide to eat the stale bread. After ripping off part of a piece that had turned mostly green, I eat only the tan parts, not entirely sure the green is supposed to be there. Well... At least I got something to eat... I think, but inside I miss getting a tray of food back on the ARK and eating it next to Maria. We would compare our portion sizes, eat whatever the other person didn't want, and generally have a great time. To think I'm never going to be able to do that ever again... My shoulders sag a bit as I toss the things I didn't eat back into the bin, and I sniffle slightly as I sit back down again. My eyes close as I try to quiet my whimpering emotions.

I'll make do. I'll move on. I will. I will. I will...