16 years old how sad

The stupidity of life

I don't know if this has happened to you before but sometimes when you are just like chilling in your bedroom and them suddenly your brain travels to a whole different dimensions and it brings some dark/awkward/annoying memories of "the time that we were stupid." *that's all the time*....(lame joke)

When this usually happen to me half of my brain is like:
-> let's get started with the regrets party, were we are going to remember of every single dumb thing that she said 3 years ago when she was talking with her crush"
And the other half is like:
-> oh shit not again... I'm gonna dig a hole in the ground and bury myself alive.

I don't know why but when this happens always the bad part wins, its like why you do this to me brain I thought we were buddies?
Caught in a lie~

So basically I start remembering those scenarios and times that I was just so embarrassing and now I really start feeling bad for myself because I know I could have done better.
For example there is this memory that hunts me and my brain just love it
*story time*

So basically I had (still do HAHA) this huge crush in this boy and I would do anything to make him keep talking to me on messenger and not leave me on read, so I was hella funny and our messages were really floating in a nice pace. One day out of nowhere he stops talking to me #badmood and that makes me really sad so I decided to  just gave him some space... 3 weeks later he texts me out of the blue with the cutest message everrrrrrrrr and I die *the end* kkkkk jokes
I was really happy that he finally took the initiative to start the conversation so I in a desperate mood to tell the  others about my love life I start texting my sister to let her know that he had texted me

Me: OMG you won't believe who just texted me!?
She: who?
Me: Guess..
She: listen I really don't really care so, if you wanna tell me just do it..
*what a lovely sister* 
Me: you know.... my ultimate crush supreme Erick

This time that shows up the narration
At this moment Shemara knew she f**ked up
Instead of pressing the button to send it to my sister I accidentally send it to him (the crush)

He/crush: what is this?
Me: *swears internally*
Me: *thinks really hard to make and excuse*
Me: *after 2mn**makes up the lamest and stupid story ever* ohhh do you know Eric nam? He is like my crush from kpop I loveee his songs
He: oh OK 
Me: *making my situation worse* you guys have the same name isn't that awesome
He: yea I think...
*never replys to any of my messages again*

This is just a small prove that the  brain is just so mean that it makes me think about this stuff right before going to sleep.
Just realising how stupid our thoughts and acts were when we were a little bit younger can make us want to crawl back again inside our mother's Vaginas

Little advice
Watch your mouth/ finger (if typing) so that you can avoid these things  because your brain never forgets

   __________________

Sorry for the lateness but preparing for college is really tough
#kisseu