Book#2 - NARRY - Don't Doubt The Life Inside

Chapter 4

Chapter 4

Niall wakes up the next morning wondering why Liam is laying down beside him, and why his arm is across his chest and cuddling into him.

“Liam... get off m-me.” Niall groans, squeezing his eyes tighter and furrowing his brows. Why was Liam even at the hospital already? The sun wasn't even pouring aggravatingly through the window yet.

Liam doesn't move though so Niall forces his eyes open and he turns his head on the pillow, preparing to shove Liam's annoying body off of his way-too-small mattress. But Niall stops functioning completely when he doesn't see Liam pressed against him.

Instead it is someone different sleeping next to him, someone he barely even recognizes anymore.

“Wha...?” Niall's words are pathetically non-existent as he tries to speak. Only a little squeak makes its way past his lips. Niall had planned for this moment for a while now but he's gone fucking brain dead and he hates himself immensely.

His face is mere inches from Harry's, and he can taste his beautiful boyfriend's breath as it dances over his lips. Niall starts to cry. And he thinks that it's stupid that of all the ways he has dreamt of this moment- seeing Harry again, never had it once crossed his mind that he'd wake up one morning being spooned by him.

Harry was in his fake-leather jacket, ripped black jeans, holey brown boots and green beanie and not only did it make him think of the day he met the boy, it made him cry loudly, sobbing out and scaring the boy awake.

Harry's eyes go wide the second he jumps awake, and his face never changes from that shocked expression. Harry looks terrified that he'd been caught. He's mortified that he had screwed up and fallen asleep and now Niall is awake, totally knowing Harry is there in his room and on his bed in front of him.

They stare for a solid 15 minutes with the same gaping mouths, but different thoughts.

Niall's mind is buzzing with, holy shit Harry is here. He's finally here And there are two pieces of metal through his face and dark bags underneath his eyes. He looks like he's had a mental breakdown, but he won't question it.

Neither of them speak up but Niall does touch his lips to Harry's softy, breath shuttering. Niall keens into Harry's mouth and lifts his hands to Harry's head, sliding his fingers under his warm beanie. Harry kisses back instantly and bites at Niall's chapped lips desperately. Moans are thrown back and forth, and- finally Niall thinks, It's about bloody time. He's only been waiting about a week but every single minute was a bullet through his heart and he thinks he's only fully realized that now.

Harry swings his leg over Niall's hip and props himself over top of the blond boy roughly. Niall groans at the friction created and he doesn't even care that neither of them had said one word. Because, honestly, they don't need to say anything.

Harry lies flat on top of Niall's body and sobs into his neck for a little while. It takes the boy a few minutes to calm down, it makes Niall cry too. Its sad and heartbreaking to see Harry in the state he is, but he'd rather it be like this then not seeing him at all.

“I'm so sorry.” Harry sobs, spreading his tears across Niall's neck and shoulder. “I love you. I love you. I really, really love you!” he continues to exclaim, as if he's trying to convince the lad under him. Niall's head hurts so much, his emotions are screwed up and Harry is yelling. He ignores it, because he can't even speak. “It should have been me.... It should have been me.” he whimpers.

“H-Harry. I-it's alright. Don't b-blame yours-self, b-baby.”

Christ. His stutter is more severe than ever, and at a time like this it's just making everything that much harder on Harry.

“Oh god...” Harry pulls his head up from Niall's shoulder and he looks so damn guilty. “Why did you save me? You should have just let him hit me. I ruin everything!” Harry pulls off of Niall's body and clambers onto the ground in an accidental tumble. But he doesn't pick himself up off of the floor and run out the door like he had planned to, no, he just lies on the cold tiles and screams towards the ground underneath him.

Niall watches Harry, speechless. His scared blue eyes follow every punch and kick Harry throws towards the ground as a darkening shadow casts over them. Niall's eyes began to go blurry and hazy as he witnesses his lover- his soul-mate- break apart into un-fixable pieces right inside his reach. But what can he do? Fall off his bed onto the floor as well and barely even stutter out a lie saying everything will be okay? Niall didn't even know what 'okay' is anymore, because the second he thinks things are finally 'okay', everything goes to complete shit and then he loses every ounce of hope in his heart.

Niall can't do anything for Harry anymore, because honestly, what was he even able to do? Niall couldn't be the thing that brings a smile to Harry's face, it seems he only creates tears and grief, and he can't be the boyfriend he was before because he's broken now, someone broke him, and he's useless. He isn't even really living anymore because 'living' is making his love's eyes glow the most impossible green and he can't even do that. So really, Niall is only existing and he is wasting everyone's time.

Niall watches as Liam bursts into the room and kneels down beside Harry's limp body and shattered soul. Everything seems to be moving in slow motion in Niall's eyes and he briefly wonders if he's about to die. His head begins to burn viciously right where his wound is and his brain feels too big for his skull. He can feel his heart slow down to an impossible pace and his hands are out of his control with his bed-sheet locked tightly inside them. Niall's weary eyes weigh down heavily and he swears he can feel his body sway side to side before he falls onto his back roughly. He passes out cold and the very last thing that rings in his ears is the heart stopping sound of Harry wearing out his throat, cursing in loud heartbreaking shrieks and crumbling into small lifeless shards of nothing across the cold hospital floor.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

sorry if that hurt you guys.... it kind of hurt me... but i promise the hurt will end cause it wont be sooo sad for much longer. 

i am aproching exam time at school so expect up dates every 2 or 3 days :) xxx

everything will back to the norm on the 28th  sooo yea. lol

i don't really have anything to say other then i love you all so much! and stay with me! its gunna get better eventually. 

PLEASE VOTE!! 

AND COMMENT. so many of you sent long comments on the last chapter and you dont eeven understand how damn happy it made me! so please continue with that <3 <3

and follow (i had like 70 follower last week and now i have 160 so wow thank you very much.)

ILY ALL! TALK TO ME IN THE COMMENTS PWEEEASEEEEE!!