A bet, a parkingspace, and love.<3

Part 7

HEY YALL! Okay... here is part 7. Enjoy!

Riding in the car with Mom now is different. Call me crazy, but because of how she handled that, I have some respect for her. We don't talk alot, but I do notice how her eyes are turning red on the ends, and at stop lights she shuts her eyes for a minute too long to be normal. She's hurting, and I'm hurting. And blocking her out right now would be pointless, so I start talking.

"Mom, it's okay to be sad. I am, so you can be too." I reach for her shoulder and pat it gently. She sniffles a little bit.

"I feel terrible. I knew about it, but I kind of assumed he'd get over it. His Dad had it for a while. But he recovered. Your Dad is strong, but not invincible. And I regret every little thing that happened between him and I. Including him giving me that kiss just then."

"Why? Clearly you both love each other."

"My point exactly. He's marrying Fearn for stability, something that I couldn't give him. And it had been so long since we kissed, I don't know how I'm going to forget it this time. It breaks my heart, you know. Do you know how him and I met?" She asks, turning to look in my eyes. I shake my head and she smiles. "You're lucky. It's one of my favorite romances of all time. So when I was seventeen I had a good group of friends and I wasn't interested in dating, for No reason other than I didn't feel like I had time. I was getting ready to leave for Yale on a full ride scholarship and in the middle of my senior year. I was on the student conscil, but I never won like President or even VP. I was social head, which meant dances. Dances meant prom, and prom meant alot of people telling me what they wanted. It was a lot of stress and to be honest I loved every minute of it. Until of course somebody new came to school. Your Dad was very quick to make popular friends and even not popular people just wanted to be around him. One night I was sitting in the library and all of the sudden the fire alarm started blaring! I was terrified, because I wasn't really aware of what was going on. I jumped out of the window on the second floor, broke my arm and twisted my ankle. And it turns out it was all a big practical joke on me because I wasn't giving your Dad much attention." She shakes her head, sighing.

"After he realized I was seriously hurt, he drove me to the hospital and stayed there until the doctor made him leave. I'd like to say that we fell in love then, but it actually made me hate him. I started a full fledged war against him, and I would have won if I had only not looked into his eyes. They were alluring, playful, and beautiful. I called a truce, and then, we fell in love. Cute huh?"

"Yeah, adorable." I sat thinking about it as we turned into the driveway of the old grand victorian home. "Mom, why don't you and Dad get back together? I mean, the secrets out, and obviously you both love each other. I would rather live with you over Fearn." I look at her as she's turning off the engine and catch a faint smile.

"As perfect as that could be, it will never be. Your father and I are so in love because we can't have each other, and if we did it wouldn't be like this. So basically were not going to have a happily ever after."

"That makes no sense at all! You guys would be perfect together. Just... Please? Maybe if you guys got back together..." I don't know what I want. All I know is I need this to just go away. I can't deal with all of this now. Everything sure has a great way of crashing down around me at the same time. After a moments pause, Mom just sighs and gets out of the car. And that silence is what sealed my fate.

::: I haven't been very sociable lately. My life sucks no matter where I am, so when Dad came by Mom's to get me, I refused. I said no out of anger, irritation, and just to feel like I have some control over my life. I almost caved, but instead channeled my inner drama queen and wouldn't go. I wanted to go, and be with him and have Chase wrap his arms around me, but I couldn't. Dad didn't mind, he told me he understood that I was angry and to come home when I felt like it. He's too understanding to be dying.

The severity of that hits me. My dad is dying, he's slowly succumbing to this monster. He's going to miss so much. He'll never see me go to my high school graduation, or college. He won't watch me move out, grow up. He wont hear any of my horror stories of my college years. He wont walk me down the aisle, or meet his grandkids, who will hopefully be calling Chase 'Daddy'.

Oh god. Chase, my virginity. That's an entirely new disaster I need to handle. Do I want to give him that trust? Why is my virginity so important? Most girls my age have had sex... why should I care if I do?

Because I'm not like those other girls. I'm not, I'm like an entirely different spieces, but... I want it too. When I kiss him sometimes, its like fire. Maybe it's teenage lust, maybe its love. But either way, I still have no idea what to do, except I'm sure of one thing.

I need to go home, say my goodbyes to my Dad, and try to build up my life again.

Fix the small cracks, and prepare for the void my Dad will take when he leaves.

So I start packing.