Child of Conquest

Chapter 3

Chapter Three

Hallam

In Raeburn it was the celebration of the spring equinox, the second since Seraphina's trip to Merton. Watching his daughter dance by the fire with Aldwyn Hammond felt contented to see a side to his daughter he rarely saw. Darea took her husbands hands and drew him into a dance amongst familiar strangers in a night of celebration.
Seraphina rarely spoke of her trip to Merton which had made her parents curious. Hammond had supposed the trip was not as exciting as she had hoped and that it may have quashed her ambitions of leaving the village, this made Darea content. He said nothing of returning to Ogden or training her and hoped that the serenity would last, all the time knowing that it would not. Like the changing of the seasons Seraphina's mood began to change, she became restless again, going for long rides and walks. It had been two years since she came home, happy and contended to return. He had watched her carefully and knew in his heart that it wouldn't last.
Seraphina was riding Ciardha to meet with Aldwyn down by the river. As she greeted her friend she dismounted and they walked along the riverbank until they reached their usual spot. Seraphina was unusually quiet as she tied the reins up on a branch.
He could see on her face that perhaps she was in no mood for his company but he had long since given up on trying appeasing her dispositions.
"Oh come on it's your birthday nearly." He nudged her.
"Aldwyn it's almost a full cycle away and really what I possible could get that would be better than time spent with my best friend." Aldwyn beamed
Seraphina laughed and patted Ciardhas nose "Ciardha really is the best friend a girl could have."
"That hurt Seraphina, I might not tell you what you might be getting now" he said tapping his nose, this got her attention.
"Do you know what my parents are planning Aldwyn?"
Aldwyn shrugged "I can't tell you."
"Oh can't you?" Seraphina dived on him tickling and pinching him.

"What am I getting, tell me." Aldwyn squirmed under the intruding hands ticking him and laughing grabbed her wrists and rolled her over pinning her to the floor.
Surprised by Aldwyn's Seraphina became aware of his breath on her face, she was infuriated that she was now defenceless. She pushed and wriggled but was unable to get free, for the first time Aldwyn had overpowered her. She stopped smiling when Aldwyn laughed triumphantly, for the first time Seraphina realised that Aldwyn was no longer the scrawny boy she had pulled into the river.
Aldwyn stopped laughing and the look in his faced changed, before she could move he bent down and kissed her. At first the shock of it immobilized Seraphina's body and then anger surged through her body. Gathering all her strength she pushed Aldwyn off and he landed to her side, she ran to Ciardha her hands trembling.
"Seraphina wait." Aldwyn's voice sounded distressed, but she did not want to look at him she managed to untie Ciardha and jumped onto the horses back.
"Seraphina, please, stop."
She felt a hand grab her reins, Aldwyn looked intently at her.
"Don't touch me please Aldwyn"
Aldwyn let go and backed away as she turned Ciardha around and raced off.
"Seraphina, I'm sorry." He wailed after her.
She heard his pitiful plea and tried to block the tears from coming. He had sounded so desperate and looked so hurt as she had shouted at him, she did not think she could bare the pain in her chest. He has spoilt everything. What was he thinking kissing me like that. How could she look at him the same after this? She chided herself for not seeing it coming, that it was her own fault for being naive. Nevertheless, they had always been friends nothing more. He knew that, how could he be so stupid? What secretly bothered her most was that he had overpowered her and for a moment she had been powerless.

She spurred Ciardha on harder wishing to get away from what had happened as quickly as possible, but it did not matter how far she went she could not get rid of how Aldwyn had looked at her. It did not matter where she went she could not make anyone happy, not her parents, her friends or even herself, the only thing she was good at was making people feel miserable, she had been wrong to think she could live happily at Raeburn. She couldn't live happily anywhere she was better off on her own, at least that way she wouldn't hurt anyone but herself. It was beginning to get dark when Seraphina got home; she opened the door and went straight to the fire.
Her mother looked up and smiled at her "Aldwyn came looking for you."
Seraphina sniffed at the small pot sat upon the fire, "Really."
Deana recognised that tone well enough, she had used it often herself.
"Broth?" said her mother "I saved some for you."
She lifted the lid with the bottom of her dress and served the contents into a small bowl. Seraphina felt the warm steam on her face, the smell made her stomach growl. Her mother passed her a small chunk of hard bread, which Seraphina dipped into the warm broth. There was something contenting about eating in front of the fire whilst her mother fussed over her.
"Have you two had a falling out then?" Seraphina watched her mother who was now looking intently right at her. Seraphina plied food into her mouth in order to escape from having to answer, but it did not stop her mother's gazing, so she shook her head.
"Well, what happened then?" Darea asked raising her eyebrows in a questioning manner.
Seraphina sighed, she really did not want to talk about this with her mother, but it appeared it was a conversation her mother was not going to give up.
"It was nothing, really."
Her mother looked disappointed "You would tell me if there was wouldn't you?"
"Yes, of course."
"You just seem very quiet of late"
"Mother I said I was fine, there is nothing wrong" Seraphina realised too late that her tone had been too sharp, she immediately apologised but it was too late. Her mothers face had already shown the signs of being wounded. She hated upsetting her mother but sometimes she just wanted to be left alone, she didn't want to talk just now, it only brought feelings all up again and it had only just stopped hurting.
She quickly ate and left the uncomfortable silence, she hated being baited into conversations, why did her mother always want to talk? It was easy to understand why her father retreated to his horses. All too soon Seraphina's anger gave way to guilt something her mother could always provoke in people. Seraphina could almost hear the blow against her chest and felt as if she was beginning to drown under the weight of her own heart.
Her chest heaved and the tears came again, how could she feel so much pain and yet feel so empty at the same time. She longed for it to stop and told herself she was being ridiculous and melodramatic, but she could not stop the aching. She began to walk faster and faster until she was running, her chest was now preoccupied with breathing and the aching gave way to being functional. However it didn't stop her mind from working, shutting her eyes against the pictures of recollection she could still hear Aldwyn apologising, she covered her ears and ran faster until her side began to hurt it was too much. Seraphina opened her eyes and ran to the trees nearby. Stopping she leant against the trunk gasping for breath, she screamed.
Picking up a branch that had fallen on the floor she began beating it against the trunk of the tree, as the branch fell to pieces she stopped and collapsed to the ground in a heap. Falling to the floor panting she looked guiltily around to see if anyone had seen her, it appeared no one was around. Dropping the branch she noticed a large piece of wood had embedded itself into the palm of her hand she carefully pulled it out; in her anger she hadn't even noticed it enter her skin. She let out a deep sigh her chest felt lighter like a huge weight had been removed, for so long she had buried her anger deep inside, releasing it felt good.
Seraphina looked at the broken branch and wiped the tears from her face, she pulled back her hair and told herself she would never let herself get into such a state again. Instead she would face her problems and confront anything that aggravated her. If she could do that then maybe she wouldn't feel so tormented to the point that she felt like she could burst.
Standing up she smoothed her dress down and turned to the tree making a mental note that things were going to change. Closing her hand over the removed splinter, she placed it in her pocket before turning towards the stables.