The Wish List

She Talks To Angels

The golden moments in the stream of life rush past us and we see nothing but sand; the angels come to visit us, and we only know them when they are gone. ~George Elliot

"Daddy, look! This angel is pretty!"

I looked up from the shelf of ceramic angels in front of me and at the little girl standing a few feet away, hopping up and down as she tried to get Ty to grab the figurine for her.

"Ally! Can you get it for me?" Tessie said, running over to me and tugging on my arm, "I just want to hold it." I gave Ty a questioning look, but he shook his head.

"I don't want her to drop it." Ty muttered. Tessie stomped her foot, pouting.

"I'm not gonna drop it, Daddy!" She whined, purposely making her voice obnoxiously high pitched.

"I said you can't hold it, Tessie. You can just look." I could hear the warning tone in Ty's voice, but Tessie didn't seem to understand. She started to shake her head, stomping her feet.

"Daddy! Please! I want to hold it and I want to right now!" I saw Ty's jaw clench as people turned to look at the four year old throwing a tantrum.

"Theresa, one more time and I'll carry you out of here and we'll sit in the car." Ty threatened. I could see it, even from where I stood a few feet away, that she was glaring right back.

"I want to hold it." She said, then did what all kids did best.

She cried.

"Ty." I finally said, "Why can't she just hold it for a second? I mean, it's just ceramic. I'll pay for it if she drops it." He shook his head at my words, picking up his crying daughter.

"That's not the point, Alyssa. She thinks she can have anything she wants. I'm not raising my daughter that way, I'm sorry. She's going to work for what she wants, earn her own money. She's going to live a normal life." He walked out of the store without another word, leaving me to listen to nothing but the bell signaling he left that rang through the store.

*

I found Ty leaning against the outside of the car when I walked out of the building, his eyes on the half open window that Tessie was peaking out of.

"Ally!" She screamed, giggling. I smiled, a little confused on how he had gotten her to stop crying and pouting so quickly.

"Tessie, sweetheart. Can you play on your tablet for a few so I can talk to Ally?" She looked back and forth between us for a second before her head disappeared out of view.

"Is everything okay?" I asked him, my hand instinctively grabbing his.

It was a habit I had picked up a few years ago, whenever Steph would say she wanted to talk, it was usually about something the doctors said that scared her. Now, anyone who said it, I immediately worried about.

"I. . . I want to go to AA." I was caught so off guard that I actually cocked my head to the side and narrowed my eyes at him.

"What?"

"I want to go to AA, I. . . I want to stop drinking entirely, Ally. It. . . if it means hurting my baby girl, hurting you, then I don't want anything to do with it." I nodded in understanding, smiling reassuringly at him.

"That's wonderful, Ty. I'm happy you're doing this." His eyes darted from the ground to me. He looked, without any doubt, shocked.

"Really?" He smiled, "I was hoping maybe, if it didn't intervene with the list, that you could come to a few meetings with me." I didn't hesitate to respond, the words left me before I could even process them.