My random writings

Numb

- January 28 2017 Saturday @ 10:36 pm-
I'm just numb to everything right now.
But my mind is going crazy with dark inexplicable thoughts. That most people don't deserve to have. I'm just here with a mind full of dark scary inexplicable thoughts that I can't escape from. I can't occupy my mind with out the help of someone.But it gets anxiety rising for me to ask people to help keep me occupied for I am scared I'll Annoy people. You'll say

'you should surround yourself with people'

Sometimes even being with someone it doesn't help. Sometimes it makes it worse for I feel that person hates Me, for it rising my anxiety higher to am unexplainable mental break down, of

•Sobbing
•Screaming
•Hair pulling
•Throwing things
•Or even self harm.

But I guess I could just try to surround my self with people to help lower my anxiety/ panic attacks and mental breakdowns huh? Though it won't help I'll just feel alone and invisible. A feeling no one should ever have to feel.