Albino Child

Four

"He will wake up from his dazed state soon, Ana, return to control. We will meet again." Ance commanded, his voice clipped, callous and calm.

I nodded slightly as Albino and Acne held hands and glided towards a vanishing point, they faded into the pale depths of the mind as I refocused and returned to the real world where I had control over the physical presence of the boy; my eyelids were heavy but I prised them open, we were going through a test inside one of the classrooms and I had missed most of the explanations of the questions but I cared little for the foolish antics that I had scraped with a passing mark. The adult's droning voice and childish chatter blended into the back of my mind as I scanned the classroom for the repetitive clicking noise, someone was creating rhythmic sounds and it was filling my mind with a desire to find out what was the source; lightly scowling through dry locks that hung over my face like a semi-opaque curtain of frosted-glass, I spun my eyes around the class only to find that the reason for the pointless noise was an end of a click-pen biro being pressed over and over relatively fast, the drilling sound of the spring being forced from one position to another was beginning to irritate me but I could not do anything to request the person to stop doing so, they were across the room in comparison to me, irritated by my lack of hopeful interruption, I clicked my tongue in frustration.

It was only a few minutes till lunch time, a spacious and relaxing part of my time that I spent in the library- it was predominantly silent, only the passing of pages between eager fingers and the gentle tapping of keys could be heard- I used my time leisurely. As I packed away my stationery and books I could hear my food-fanatic friends demanding me to hurry up, I dismissed it with petty ignorance as they rolled eyes and left, leaving me to depart the white-walled classrooms amidst the slug-paced students; as I zipped up the dark teeth of my bag, I silently watched the few people remaining with care and recorded exactly what they did- I had heard of people writing records for others around them but that seemed foolish for those who found out of such an object would sneer in disgust, I, instead, remembered everything internally: filing actions into dated compartments within fields and tables that occupied my systematic mind. Finally, once I had finally procrastinated long enough for none of my friends were around I cleared off the barren room and strolled towards the department of relaxation and realisation- when I was younger, I would take a small part out of my meals and that removal grew and grew, until I no longer needed to eat such a mundane midday meal- opening the entrance I was greeted with the bittersweet aroma of worn out pages of used books, steaming milky coffee and comforting candy-cakes, they drowsily drowned the paper-lined cavity as slow slumber-like movements brought me to the computers that bordered the small nook that hooked in for unobtrusiveness; I typed in a couple of useless details and pressed enter once I was done, a curly blue icon appeared in a kaleidoscope of cool colours, they blended and flowed on top of one another in an entrancing manner- I watched the hues twirl in a looping motion like a fascinated child, such simple actions should have been ignored by people my age but I was still caught up in its motion- once the page cleared to reveal a plain monochromatic background wide eyes disappeared and narrowed as I blankly tapped in my name.

"Pro-Ana," I mumbled mutedly, "Where is the site...?"

Clicking the first blog that popped up I scrolled through the commandments people made for the improvement of my body with the celestials of above, while I did not believe that there was another Ana whom was of elite class I did believe that the rules were one that should be followed for physical perfection. Even since I was a mere child I had desired the perfect appearance, while I was not blessed with the gifts of facial beauty, slender figure nor an intellectually attractive mind, I did wish to change- I would go to read and consume large sections of text that belonged to dark and complicated stories to try and broaden my horizons, I did not have the natural affinity for understanding so a two-in-one dictionary-thesaurus became my close-hand, the only problem being that people who thought I was strange for being on the fringe of the school used to throw books at me and speak foreign curses that I only assumed were negative for I could never understand what they meant in rapid-fire... Well, I had no idea what language they spoke back then. Thankfully, I had changed schools to escape the painful grasp of students' that never understood my thirst for perfection, looking back, the damage they inflicted had little to no effect on my current standing- I was comforted by the presence of my mind and that was enough, it was much simpler then, my world consisted of the feminine toys that my father hated and the interactions I had with the inanimate friends internally and externally.

My father... He despised my pathetic nature, he wanted to have a son that was strong, tall and athletic but was cursed with a docile air-head boy who preferred to have tea parties with soft-toys in the dim safety of the house than play football at the local park with the macho neighbours; when I was small I could recall a specific moment of particular distress, my mother- a wonderful and accepting figure that appreciated my feminine tendencies and smiled at my innocent choices, she initially hoped for a female child and was a little disappointed with a male but after soon realising my preferences for girlier things she opened up and warmed to my strange personality. I was glad and wholeheartedly thankful that I she took time to nurture me out of the delicate shell of my mind, naturally like a hermit crab she taught me how to seem open and friendly by taking me to the park. That is where I met her, she was actually-

The bell rung like a shrill operatic banshee, closing the website, I shut down the computer and I payed no attention to the boy next to my whose eyes bulged open upon noticing I had done so, it was not like it mattered anyway- the person could always turn on the computer. I reached under the table which the computer lay on and snatched my bag; routinely draping it off my bag, I walked like every other child to the next lesson- I was auto-mode, everything faded out into my personal thoughts...