JOHN: Do The Hunting Thing

Possibly a Homosexual

Shitty GodTier puns up ahead. They'll be in italics. I am so sorry for the cringe.

==>Be The RapGod

Standing up, I offered a hand to the blue eyed kid. "Come on. We should go to the roof before Bro gets all pissy." He nodded, silently standing up. "Remember, John. I'm not going to hurt you." Smirking softly, I leaned over to whisper in his ear. "Unless.. you want me to?" This only made his face go red, and he pushed me away. "I-I'm not a homosexual, Dave." I ironically pouted a bit. With how much he says it, I wouldn't be surprised if 'I'm not a homosexual' would be his final words..

  "Well, your clothes are on the chair don't bother to brush your hair. Don't really care. Come out of the room when you're ready." I walked out of the room, sitting against the door and pulling my phone out. Candy Crush. Fuck yeah.

  ==> BE THE CLOSET HOMOSEXUAL!

Be the.. what? BUT IM NOT A HOMOSEXUAL!

I pulled my clothes on silently, pondering over the events from the past few days. So me and my sister went to kill Striders, got kidnapped apparently, and now I think DAVE is flirting with me. Nopenopenope. Not today Dave. Not today.

  Deciding to go against Dave, I brushed my hair anyways, but as usual, it was untamable. Walking to the door, i tried to open it. It wouldn't budge. I tried a few more times with no success. I was freaking out right now, thinking that I was locked in a demon's bedroom with no internet, which spelled death in my hormonal teenaged mind.

  Then the door opened, causing me to fall in my ass. Dave just stood there blankly, looking down at me. "Dude. It's push. Not pull." I pouted up at him. "You didn't tell me that!" "Figured you would've known, Egbutt."  I gasped melodramatically. "Say that again. I dare you." "Egbutt."   And it was WW3 up in this bitch.

   Actually, no it wasn't. I threw a punch, and Dave flipped me over onto my back, knocking the breath out of me. He chuckled. "If you're going to do this all day, I have the time." Huffing, I held my arms out. "Please, I think you broke my ass."

  It was true. I had landed on my tailbone, and it really hurt. "Oh no! I damaged the precious Egbooty! Whatever shall I do?" I could tell he was being sarcastic. "Daavveee! This is so uncool of you!" He said nothing, picking me up bridal style. "Whelp. Better show off my latest catch to the ladies."

My face went pink at this. "No, Dave. You will not introduce me to anyone while carrying me." He smirked. "How about I do it anyways?" He was walking out of the door and into the hall. "Daaaveee! Put me down!" "No can do Egbert." Realizing escape would be futile, I eventually leaned against him. Damn. Were demons always this warm?

He walked me into the living room, putting me on the couch, and sitting beside me. Content with being able to sit by myself, I relaxed. Only to be pulled onto his lap. I whined softly. "Noo.." To which he responded, "Yess.."

This went on for a few more minutes, the sound of our voices rising until we were cut off by another demon coming into the room, and she looks a little pissed.

"Shut it up guiys I'm trying to slaep." To be honest, she sounded a bit hung over, or drunk at least. She flipped onto the couch beside Dave, leaning on him in a lover-like way; holding onto his arm.

I cleared my throat. "So Dave.." I took a breath. "Is this your girlfriend?" The girl and Dave both tensed for a second, then the girl laughed. Loud.

"Haha. Noo! I'm his sistar!" She beamed a bright smile, showing off sharp teeth. Since Dave was a demon.. did this mean she was too? "Roxy Lalonde, nice ta meet cha!" She held a hand out. I shook it. "John Egbert."

"Well, John, you can call me Rolal or Mom. I don't really careee!" I looked at Dave, raising an eyebrow. As if he once again read my mind, he responded. "My other sister calls her mom. It's better if you don't ask." I nodded, about to say something to Dave, but my thoughts were interrupted by Roxy. "Imma call you Johnny! So Johnny, how do you feel about lil miss Strider here?" She was referring to Dave, and I felt my ears burn red at that. "Well I.. um.. we kinda.. just met." She nodded. "Do you think he's cute? Do you want to Mack on him? Do you want to do him? Do you want to-" I kinda drowned her out at that point.

And that's when a flying sword impaled itself into the wall right beside my head.

Yay! We got Roxy up in here! And judging from John's blushing, I'm starting to see a relationship, don't you? Apparently Roxy ships it as well. Btw, this is my longest chapter, and I might start making them longer like this from here on out. And also, drop me a comment if you are enjoying this story, and what you want to see happen next.