Heartbeat (Eremin)

Seasons Die One After The Other

Seasons Die One After the Other- Amazarashi

"He's worse off than we thought he was." Armin heard the nurse say to his grandfather. It had somehow sunk through the daze of painkillers and other drugs they were pumping into his system at an alarming rate.
Everything was fuzzy, but one thing was clear.
Eren was by his side and he was crying. So hard.
Armin didn't think he had it in him.
"If he doesn't get the surgery in two weeks, he won't make it."
"But no doctor wants to perform it. They all say it's too risky."
"It is. But the chance Armin living a full life after surgery is forty percent higher than if we just left him like this."
"Look, if you can manage to find a surgeon willing to perform the operation, by all means. But nobody here can do that sort of thing."
"My dad can." Eren mumbled, wiping the tears from his eyes. "He was supposed to do the same surgery on my mom until he backed out."
"How do you know he won't back out this time too?" The nurse asked.
"He won't. I'll make sure."

***

"Dad, I need you to do this."
"I can't. I'm only a family doctor now. I don't do surgeries."
"Well, make an exception! Armin is my best friend!"
"Eren, you'll understand when your older."
"My only friend is dying and you're the only one we can get to help. If you don't do this one thing I'll never forgive you as long as I live."
"Fine. I'll do it. But if I fail this is on you."
"Deal!"

***

"Eren..." Armin looked so fragile sitting there in the bed with tubes and shit coming out of his face and arms. He was way paler than he should be and his heartbeat was way too slow.
"Save your energy, Armin." Eren begged. "You want to be as strong as possible for your surgery tomorrow."
"But..." Armin held out his hand and Eren took it. "This could be the last time we talk."
"Nah. You'll do fine. I promise."
"But just in case..." Armin intertwined their fingers. "I need to say something."
"Yeah?"
"I love you, Eren."
"I love you too. So be strong, cuz I'll be your boyfriend when you make it out alive."
"Promise?"
"Absolutely."
"Can you kiss me?"
"Yeah. No problem."
There actually was a problem. He was terrified. Eren was afraid that if he kissed Armin, the boy would shatter into a million pieces. He wanted to say "I'll kiss you when you come out."
But what if he never came out? What if Armin died in there?
He would never get to kiss this boy he loved so much.
So he leaned forward and pressed his mouth against Armin's, kissing him with everything he had. He was messy and he was afraid and he sure as hell didn't know what he was doing, but when he pulled away Armin was smiling and that was all that mattered.
"I'm never going to see the ocean, am I?" His smile dissolved into tears.
"Armin, I will do everything in my power to make sure you do." Eren held Armin close and rubbed his back until he calmed down.
"I love you so much, Armin. I won't let anything bad happen to you."
"Thank you."