Impossible

Chasing Cars

GERARD’S POV

I ride with Frank to the hospital, not daring to leave his side.  The paramedics are doing everything they can, I just can’t help but wonder if it’ll be enough.  We make it to the hospital fast and Frank is soon rolled away into intensive care.  The doctors are with him for hours, but I don’t leave.  I know I could, that I don’t have to wait for him.  But part of me has to wait, I need to know that he’ll pull through.  I wait for hours before I see Frank being taken to a room.  A let out my breath that I didn’t realize I was holding in, this means that he’s okay, that there’s hope.

When the nurses finally allows me to go in, I walk over and sit in a chair right besides Frank’s bed.  He’s unconscious and looks so peaceful when he’s sleeping.  I don’t know what I’ll do, but I’m going to make sure that Frank never does something like that again.  It’s early in the morning now, I’m surprised that the nurse let me sit in here with Frank.  I want to be here when he wakes up, I have to be.

I sit by his side for hours more, watching his breath go steadily in and out.  I don’t know why, but I take a hold of his hand while he’s sleeping.  So he knows I’m here, but I think it’s really so I know that he’s really there and is really okay.

When the sun begins to rise, Frank’s eyes flutter open.  My breath catches in my throat.  “Frank?” I ask tentatively.

He turns his head slightly to look at me and smiles.  He whispers, “I didn’t think I’d see you again.”

I squeeze my eyes shut, to try to keep from crying and hold his hand tighter.  I open my eyes to see him looking at me, I think he’s trying to read me.  I don’t know what made me do this, but I lean forward and press my lips into his.  He presses back into me, his lips are dry and a little cracked from not being attended to for a while.  I didn’t think I could feel something this strongly, but here with him, I feel like I need him.  I finally sit back, and look at him, “You had me so scared.”

A minute later, a doctor comes in.  I stand up and look around, feeling self-conscious.  I look to Frank, “I should probably go….”

But Frank holds tight to my hand, “I’d like you to stay.”  So I sit back down and wait for the doctor.

After pulling out a clipboard, he looks to Frank, “Well Frank you’re looking stable.  We’d just like to keep you here for the day to make sure you’re alright.”

Frank just nods, so the doctor leaves.  Frank turns his head away from me, quietly saying, “I’m sorry I put you through all of this….”

“Please don’t be sorry Frank,” I gently touch his chin and bring his face to look back at me, “You don’t know how glad I am that you’re alright.”  We sit there for a few silent moments before I ask, “Is there anyone I can contact for you?”

Frank looks down and shakes his head.  I wish there was more I could do for him.  “If I lay here, would you…” shyly, he looks back into my eyes, “Would you lay with me and just… forget the world?”

I smile and brush the hair from his face, “I’d love to.  Let me just tell my lab that I won’t be in today.”  Quickly, I pull out my smartphone and email my lab manager telling them that my friend’s had an accident and I won’t be able to work today.  They quickly respond saying that they’ll take care of my tissue cultures for today.  I bring my attention back to Frank. 

I decide to get onto the hospital bed with Frank.  He moves over to make room for me, so I lay down next him.  I envelope him in my arms, I just think he needs someone to be here with him right now.  Hell, I need someone to hold too.