Growing Love

28

Two months have passed, and I have been trying to end all this drama before all the important events arrive. Jenny and Marcus' wedding is coming up, along with Mickey's birthday, followed by Marcus and James'. They decided to just have one huge party for the three of them a month before the wedding. I want to celebrate everything peacefully. That's why I have been putting myself through what I am doing now.

"Carter." I look up, and the light bouncing from her blond hair catches my eye. "I know this must be hard for you. You don't have to do this." With Ethan's support, I have been seeing Katherina. But not in the way you might think. I want to end all the drama caused by her and her family in the past. That's why, we have been meeting up every few days. Today it's at a coffee shop.

"No, it's fine. We need to clear the air as soon as possible." I made sure to let her known touching me is not allowed. Even shaking hands was a no go. She was confused, but agreed to it anyway. "How have you been adjusting these past few days?"

"It's different, but in a good way." Andrew and I found a home for her closer to the estate. Two of our men stay close to make sure her parents can't reach her. The night she told us what happened, they returned home to grab her things and leave. Her parents didn't like that. She actually tried to push her down the stairs, and blame the whole thing on Andrew. They would have succeeded had one of the guards not taken her place. He was actually tired of taking orders from them, and hurting Katherina. He is in the hospital recovering. But sadly, the Harrisons managed to cover the whole thing up again. "I managed to get majority of my things from that house, now I'm looking for work." She looked down at her hands, and twisted the ring on her finger around and around.

"Why didn't you ever say anything?" I rubbed the rim of my coffee with my thumb. She gave me a small smile before sipping her cup of tea.

"You came to me to forget your problems, and you always left when we were done. On the rare days you would stay longer, I couldn't exactly come out and say 'hey. I was sexually abused' could I?" She had a point. We didn't exactly have a relationship in the first place. It was more like we did a service for each other.

"Did our sleeping together ever affect you?" She looked at me, and I saw sadness in her eyes. Thinking back, it was always there, I was just to selfish to notice it. Andrew even told me he thought we had the same eyes. I should have caught it back then, I should have known.

"I loved you Carter." I feel more like a dick. Thinking back to my past, I was a player. I used women to make myself look good, to forget my problems. I treated them like objects, and didn't care what problems they may have had. The me back then, and the me now are two completely different men. I don't ever want to be that guy again.

"Katherina, I'm sorry if I ever hurt you in the past. We've both made mistakes, and hurt many people. I have been talking with my therapist, and he suggested these visits. So we can both clear the air between us. But even then, I would have wanted to do this, and Ethan agreed. Before anything else, I want to apologize to you for never taking the time to think abut your feelings. And also, thank you, for helping me with mine." I meant every word.

"Your not fair Carter. The point is to make me fall out of love with you, not make me fall for you even more." We laughed together, and I think that's the first time it ever genuinely happened. We talked a bit more, and she told me the court day had been set. Her parents wanted Nick back, and now felt they had everything in order to do it.

"What about you?" Asked asked her. She sipped her tea and looked at me with a confused look on her face.

"What about me?"

"Do you want Nick back? Or even to be apart of his life."

"No." She didn't hesitate. "I'm not fit to be a mother. I knew that even before I had him. He belongs with you, even I know that." She rubbed the rim of her tea as well as she stared into it. She was quiet for a moment.

"Do you want him to know who you are?" It felt easy to talk to her now for some reason.

"I'll leave that to you and Ethan to decide. I won't try and force myself into his life. If later down the line, he himself wants to meet with me. Then that's when I'll do it. But other than that, he doesn't need to know." Little by little I was seeing her differently. Without the influence of her parents, she is actually a decent person.

"Do you ever see yourself having more kids?" She laughed and shook her head no. It was an instant response too.

"I still have a weak body. Having Nicholas almost killed, so I had surgery to make sure that won't happen again. Nick is my first and only child." After that we finished our time together. She told me the information on her parents, and we agreed to meet again in a few days.

When I got home, I was greeted with the sight of my family all sitting together having fun. I smiled knowing that I would never have to return to an empty house. I wouldn't need to rely on strange women to forget the troubles of my everyday life. I have my husband and son, and my whole family here to talk to.

"Hey son, welcome back." I smiled my dad, and at my family as they all welcomed me back. Ethan stood up, and kissed my lips.

"Dada!" Nick wobbled to me, and stuck his hands out for me to pick him up. This is my life now, this is me now. And I am thankful everyday for that.