Set Me Free

'And how blissful it was.'

"When he speaks again, I can tell that he's smiling. "So I guess we saved each other."

*1 year later*

Life was good.

A short time ago, the notion would have been laughable. When you were beyond fixable, how could life ever be good again?

However, I came to a realisation.

No one was ever truly broken.

People were pretty resilient things it turns out, constantly changing and evolving. The human heart can take on much damage, but somehow even though you believe it may never beat again, it heals. Humans can suffer through immense heart break, and they too heal.

It may seem impossible, for a while it may seem like you will never know happiness again, but it gets better. Hitting rock bottom only means that you have one way left to go, and that's up.

The hardest thing you will ever have to do is pick yourself up once you hit the bottom. To find the strength within you to keep fighting, the power within you to face what was out there can seem too much for you to even contemplate. But you can't live your life at rock bottom, sooner or later, you have to pick yourself up, dust yourself off and face the world once again.

I feel proud of myself every day that I did.

It wasn't easy, it was the hardest thing I ever had to face. There were feelings, thoughts, nightmares that I wasn't quite ready to face. I thought that if I tried to pick myself up again and failed once more, that the blow would kill me, that I couldn't face another failure. In not trying, I had already lost. I had taken myself out of the game in fear that I'll come last.

I'm not so scared anymore.

Sometimes, something will remind me that will stop my heart dead. Sometimes, I dream about the things I have suffered through. Some days, I forget how strong I am. Things were never going to be easy, I wasn't going to sail through life, but I was stronger for it. Living through it all only made me realise how strong I was, showed me what I could survive.

And you best believe that I survived.

Every day, I thank whatever mystical force is out there that I met him. I don't know if it was fate or the universe or a deity, but something bought him to me and I feel privileged that they did.

Whenever I felt like giving up, he would be there, reminding why I was fighting so hard. He would smile softly at me, take me into his arms and remind me that I was worth saving.

For the second time in my life, Daniel had saved me.

It took months of detoxing, months of talking and fighting and emotional breakdowns, but I did it.

As of today, I am one year sober.

It was the biggest achievement of my life, one that I wanted to wear around like a badge of honour. Not many people understood the accomplishment that this was, but to me, it was a proof that I could do it, another stepping stone in recovery.

"My name is Elizabeth and I'm an alcoholic", I say once again to the people before me.

They reply back with "hello Elizabeth," in unison, and await my story.

"Four years ago, I was kidnapped in broad day light. From here, I was kept captive in a warehouse as a bargaining chip to make my father pay back the drug debt he was in. I was beaten, broken down, treated like I was nothing more than an object that could be used. But, there was a silver lining within my hell. I met Daniel, a fellow prisoner, within the warehouse. He made everything seem like it was okay when it wasn't, he made me laugh when I wanted to cry. I wouldn't have made it out if it wasn't for him and I am thankful every day that I met him.