The Adventures of a High School Programmer

Do you want to buy a duck?

Anerd Nowak chucked the only object in reach – a coconut. Quickly, he fumbled past the bullets into room 105a. Without hesitation he slammed the door close from the mercenaries waiting on the other side. Failing to kick the door open, the gruff looking men flailed in anger. With a sigh of relief Anerd turned around from the door and shifted his focus to the classroom.

               Shell sat with a glob of clay on the desk. An attempt at configuring the clay into a duck stared pathetically back at her. Angrily she punched the table beneath her. Meanwhile, Anerd had come up to Shell to question the existence of the sad piece of clay.

               With a defeated sigh, Shell asked, “You want to buy a duck.”

               Anerd raised an eyebrow. Because it was impossible for Shell to replicate the aforementioned act she marvelled jealously at him. Confused, Anerd poked the duck.

               “A what?” he inquired.

               Frowning, she repeated, “A duck.”

               He bravely poked the glob again. Expecting a reaction, Anerd cringed a little as he made contact. Satisfaction crossed his face as the glob stayed steadily in its place.

               “But,” Anerd wondered, “Can it quack?”

               Shell looked philosophically into blank space. She scratched lightly at her head. Questions crossed her mind on the very definition of quacking. Is quacking a state of being? Or is it something that simply is? Could be a confrontation between soul and the outside? Maybe it was something deeper…

               “Of course it can,” she replied finally.

               Unconvinced, Anerd stroked his hairless chin. He mumbled to himself in Chinese. Upon realising he had drank about three liters of orange juice his internal monologue screamed, “ce suo zai na li?” But, then he remembered the duck.

               “Hey Elgit,” he addressed.

               “Yeah,” the nerdy kid with glasses answered.

               “Do you want to buy a duck?”

               In contemplation, Elgit removed his classes, cleaned them off, and put them on his face. He eyed Anerd suspecting a trap.

               “A what?”

               Anerd studied the glob once more and faced Shell. “A what?”

               “A duck,” she reaffirmed.

               Turning towards Elgit, Anerd proceeded to grab the glob. In the light, the glob remained as dull and malformed as it had been on Shell’s table. With an outstretched arm, Anerd shoved the glob in front of Elgit’s face. A curious look passed the nerd.

               “A duck,” Anerd reiterated.

               Elgit laced his fingers together and shifted in his seat. A slight tilt of the head produced a look of intrigue in the young men. Scanning the glob, Elgit agreed it was indeed a fine specimen.

               “But,” questioned Elgit, “Can it quack?”

               Just as Anerd turned around to ask Shell if the duck quacked the mercenaries drove a battering ram into the door. In defeat, the door fell down mimicking the dead pose of a maiden whose weakness had done her over.

---x

Will Anerd defeat the mercenaries? Will Shell ever stop being so angry? Most important will anyone ever buy the duck?

Stay tuned for the next weeks edition of the ridiculous and seemingly unimportant life of Elgit Dvorakova, high school programmar, and his associates.