Life Through My Eyes

Moving On

I look around and see the serene guise of my peers
They breathe and live and think with no worry
Yet, I sit, staring at my paper as my nail polish chips
I reflect, meditating on my day so far and to come
My chest tightens, as if a string is pulled taut
My throat closes and each second becomes an hour
My body is uprising, deliberately dismantling me
I tell myself I am fine, I am calm, that it's nothing
But I can't believe it.

My mind spirals, hurdling from one catastrophe to the next
I try to abate my breath, I try to steady my hands
My hand is trembling, as if I had injected coffee into every nerve
My thoughts surge faster than the rain outside the clouded window
But nothing works.

I see the things I have to do, the never ending list of responsibilities
I am aware of my faults, I know why I feel like I can't breathe
But it won't stop.

I glance around the room, desperate for comfort, for logic.
The wail of the bell sounds, summoning me from my thoughts and 
I capture my things and move on.

a.b.