Typical.

Chapter 7: Explinations

Noah tossed back shot after shot and so did I. It was only ten, but it was going to be a nice, long, late night. He folded his arms around me and impatiently kissed me, his hands roaming all over my body. The other people in the room were already wasted. I mean, it was going to be a fun night.

Ever since Liam left, Kate and Michelle had been getting more and more into shit they shouldn’t have. I mean, without Liam’s responsibility, they had no angel on their shoulder to fight with the devil. They’d brought me to parties before, but none like this. It wasn’t even midnight and people were already trashed. I’d seen half naked girls run from guy to guy and too many liquor-fueled hookups were happening. Noah was glued to my side and the more shots he took, the touchier he got and the more I took, the more I let him.

No one paid any attention to the fact that we were eating each other’s faces right in the middle of someone’s living room. He backed away and put a white tablet on his tongue. With my frontal lobe heavily subdued, I kissed him and with my tongue, fished it into my mouth and swallowed.

Within an hour of taking the tablet, everything in my body told me that I was ready to lose my virginity, everything between Noah and I was a hindrance to my raging desires, everything was going into a frenzy.

His kisses just felt so damn good, even better than they normally did. The lights around us were flashing bright blurs of colors and the people were so loud and the music was making me shake and it felt wonderful and I’m pretty sure Noah was fingering me in front of everyone but I didn’t care and it felt amazing and I never wanted it to stop and, and, and, and, and…

 

My eyes snapped open and I pushed my head back into the seat of the plane and exhaled. I wiped beads of sweat off my brown and assured myself. It’s just a dream, Evie.

Liam had been so confused when I left.

I’d fled upstairs after kissing him and didn’t see him until I walked downstairs with my bags packed and puffy eyes from crying. He asked what happened and said that he was sorry and I heartlessly left him confused to figure out for himself what had happened. Hell, I didn’t even know what was happening. I just kept thinking about everything I tried to forget long ago.

My mom hates me. I don’t have a father. My boyfriend is mad at me and will be even madder when he finds out I cheated. And I left my best friend after blurring our whole relationship. And I may have been raped, but I have no one to confirm it.

What’s wrong with me? Why do I fuck everything up?

The plane smelled too sterile and stale. The seat was uncomfortable. The view wasn’t even visible from above the clouds. All I had was my head to entertain me—memories I wanted to suppress. When the plane touched down, I realized that in the armrest, there were five nail marks from where my nails had dug into it. I gulped as I slowly made my way out of the plane, out of the airport, and back home. I had to say, I was terrified. My mom was surely going to be home.

I barely had enough cash left to pay the driver, but I didn’t care. I gulped as I pushed my way through the door.

“Shit!” was the first thing that escaped my lips upon entry. There I saw, clear as day, my mother, sitting topless on the kitchen counter with a man between her legs, their lips attached. Mom looked at me, fumbled to cover herself with a blouse that was somewhere near her, and her new boyfriend, I assumed, stepped back.

“Evelyn! Have you ever heard of knocking?”

I couldn’t say anything. My jaw was just there, on the floor, watching the man push past me and slam the door behind him on his way out. He obviously had the good sense to leave before there was a full-blown catfight. World War III material.