bow your heads to a nations swinging axe.
she said
'shit
i'm going crazy in here
somebody
please
save me'
but no one ever came
and the darkness pressed in on her from all sides
she lay with her thoughts under a bleak starlight
candle snuffed out
because she couldn't bear to see the horror she had pursued until its evil
carved its way into her system
shown in every line and cut and burn and inch of hatred
she poured over herself like gasoline
she only needed a match
she only needed a match.
she fought a war with herself
until she choked on the pain
lungs filling with tar
suicide gripped every dream she ever thought she had
until every helpless plea came out as a drug-induced whisper
until at night, as her head hit the pillow, she dreamed of bridges,
and her body tumbling from the tallest one there was
and at night time,
she dipped soft
the very ends of her toes into the puddles of blood
that held every cruel thought that infested her mind like maggots
until maggots wormed their ways out of her eyeballs, because her brain was simply
a holiday home for the wicked
a tidal wave of black fear rose higher and higher over the rotten defences that still stood guard over her body - her mind was already too far gone, nothing left of that could be salvaged -
and with each and every breath her lungs filled with dread
she wished they would fill with smoke - but good smoke was becoming increasingly herder to find
- so she swam in the shit-stained oceans chasing pride in a heartless galleon
until, until, until
words meant nothing to her anymore
and the tidal wave reached its limit
and broke over her shore
consuming her in its perpetual darkness
spinning a dripping black tangled web of madness
and this sinking feeling never dies.