Unconditional Love (Editing)

Chapter Seven

Chapter Seven

With my father dead, a whole pack to run and a bunch of personal problems, I'm left alone to handle everything. I'm still in mourning and it's been over a year since it has happened. 

The coroner hadn’t let us see my dad’s body. He said that it was not for us to see him the way he was.  

The funeral was depressing. Only the pack was invited to come. As tradition, we all turned into our wolves. 

I know what you are thinking. "How could you turn into your wolf in the public?!" 

The answer to that is simple. We wolves have our own grave yard. It's pretty big considering the fact that it's open to all packs around the area. Now we all know that's a lot. At my school, we have at least 3 alphas, including me.

Anyways, during the funeral my mom was the one to give the eulogy. It took forever because she couldn't stop crying in between almost every word. Most of it was how much she was going to miss him, how much the pack was going to miss him, and how I was going to do a great job as the female alpha. 

I have never cried so much in my life. It took about five months before I was able to function right again. As a werewolf, when you experience pain, it's a whole other level. The pain is so intense; you can actually feel a part of your heart breaking inside of you. It happens to a lot of wolves. But most try to stop the pain before it happens. Since the loss was so sudden, I didn't have enough time to try and prepare myself. So the pain for me was ten times worse than any other pain you can imagine. 

Not to mention that I’m not mated yet. Usually the mate would help and try to take the pain away. It has to do with the special bond that you have with them. No other wolf can do that for you, not even if they’re really close to you and you trust them with all of your heart. It has to be your mate.

Sure I know who my mate is but I still haven't talked to him. Especially with all that has happened. I've gone to school without questions. But I stayed away from everyone. I went to class and went home. That was the routine for the past year. My junior year has come to a close and now next year I was going to be a senior.

I still think about my dad constantly, especially when I have to do something important for the pack, or I have to go to those stupid pack meetings. I just can't believe he's gone... He left me to fend for our family, our pack.  The pack he left in my hands, all of it, every hooligan, beta, rogue, elder, everything. I didn't know if I was ready to lead. I didn't have enough time to prepare. I was inexperienced. A year wasn’t enough

Leading a pack is a lot of work. As alpha, you have to make sure everything in the pack runs smoothly. All the rogue wolves have to be kicked out and all the drama has to be settled. 

It's a lot of work for a 17 year old girl...

Balancing the pack, my last year in school and my mate, whom I still have to talk to, I am pooped.

Its summer right now and I'm enjoying the time away from everyone. It gave me time to rejuvenate myself from all other worries but the pack. I always have to worry about my pack.

I was anxious to see my mate again. Being away from him was driving me off the wall. For that reason, I couldn't wait to get back to school. My wolf would whine at night, trying to call for my mate’s wolf. She wouldn’t get anything in return though, since we have accepted each other yet.

I may still be mourning but I’ve learned to accept the fact that dad is gone. He wouldn't want me to sit around, all depressed, waiting for his never-coming return. 

"If I could go back in time and change what happened to you, I would." I said to myself.

I was locked in my room at the moment, looking out at the window. I looked up at the sky and watched the endless clouds crawl by.