The Teenage Ranto$phere!ーWith Two Times The Trouble

Some more Random Thoughts I need to get out of my mind

(Typing this in my free time, just so you wanted to know)

It's kinda funny how every single one of my 'friends' (yeah I wanna put this in quotes because I'm not so sure I can call anyone my friend anymore) think it's okay to call me and text me anytime and talk to me about their problems (and anything they have in their mind) and expect me to remember it, even when I am actually busy for once (like right now), but when I feel like I want to tell them anything of my own accord and even try to tell them, they just choose to bail on me. Every single freaking time. And I'm kinda losing my patience here because this has happened WAY too many times.

Even when we don't have anything called exams, each time I try to talk about anything related to me, they'll just shut me down and talk about their own problems.

Now, I kinda understood when my friends told me they were too busy to listen to me for 2 seconds before exams. But I wonder if they still remember the fact that I had been considerate (and foolish) enough to listen to them and help them out as much as I could, even when I had my own exams, for the sake of humanity.

It feels like I'm everyone's dustbin where they dump their problems and expect me to willingly help them face it later.

But everyone ignores (literally and figuratively) my feelings and problems I deal with (FORGIVE MY FOR NOT LIVING THE PERFECT LIFE HUH) and when I do try to tell them, they're like, "Oh, I'm too busy and BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH because I have this exam and that tuition and stuff. You should study too and stuff"

Well, excuse me for having free time on my hands simply because I'm smarter and faster than you, you got it? And also, it isn't like I'll talk forever because I have just a small thing to tell someone and I felt like you'd the best person to tell that to.

Call this throwing a tantrum and being childish if you want, but all I'm doing here is trying to say the fact that you guys (my friends) are being treated pretty fairly since they have people to tell stuff to, while I don't. And every time I try to say the smallest thing, they don't have the time to listen to it. Ain't I just lucky?

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Heh, don't bother apologizing anyway or asking me if I'm upset, because yeah, I am. Every bit of me is upset. And if you guys think saying that I'm being childish or that I'm wasting my time writing this, makes you guys sound more mature and stuff, then no, I'll be honest, you guys just sound selfish.

I wonder if anyone will care if I just disappear tomorrow, just like that. I doubt they'll even care. And I know I sound depressing as hell, but I'm stating a fact, and facts are usually depressing.